We hear about sexism in academia all the time.
From the sciences to literature to philosophy, it seems that women can never catch a break. As much as I’d like to say that international affairs and politics are different…unfortunately, I’d be lying.
When I decided to major in International Affairs at UGA, there were a couple of negative factors I knew I would have to deal with. One is imposter syndrome—that constant, annoying feeling that I don’t belong in those classes. I also thought about how exhausting it would be, reading and discussing politics on a day to day basis. It can definitely take a toll on you.
What I didn’t expect, though, was blatant sexism.
At first, it was just miniscule things that I didn’t even initially pick up on. A guy talking over me during a discussion. A guy latching onto what I say and pointing out every single flaw, with the dreadful beginning of, “Well, actually…” A guy explaining concepts or events that he assumed I had no knowledge of, despite the fact that I sat in the same class as him and took in the same information as he did.
Something I’ve struggled with a lot in international affairs is this constant feeling of insecurity. It’s the phenomenon of imposter syndrome that I mentioned before: it feels like everyone else knows what they are doing, and I don’t, so I don’t deserve to be there. Dealing with that is its own issue, but in combination with combating the mansplainers and know-it-alls, it can be disastrous.
As a woman, I can’t really afford to be insecure in these classes. If I want to be heard, I have to stand my ground and voice my thoughts with complete confidence, as if it’s the only right answer in the world. Because if I don’t, then I’ll be talked over and forgotten, the men doing what I could not.
Is it whiny to say that it’s not fair? Because it really isn’t fair. I should be allowed to have my own insecurities and fears without feeling like my entire reputation and standing in a class will crumble to the ground. After all, the guys can do that. They can have an off day where they say something stupid or say a wrong answer. They’ll just get it together the next day, and their mistake will be completely forgotten.
And while it seems that a woman can do the same, I’ve just noticed that there’s more of a stigma against women who mess up in academia. Instead of it just being a one-time mistake, we get the labels of “ditsy” or “foolish”—and once you get those, they’re really difficult to get rid of.
I’ve struggled my entire life with being assertive, so it’s ironic that I chose a major where I have to be assertive. I think I’ve also always been scared of assertiveness because I want to please everyone and I don’t want to come off overbearing. But that is yet another unfortunate example of internalized misogyny (a woman can’t be assertive, remember? Because then they’re a “bitch.”).
Even though I’m going to struggle more in international affairs as a woman than I would as a man, that just makes it all the more important to stick with it. Because we do need women in politics, and we need to pave the way so others can follow in our footsteps and have it easier. Maybe they’ll never have it as easy as the men, but still. They should have it easier.
So if you’re in a male-dominated field and deal with your fair share of sexism, take this as a sign to keep going. Your hard work will not go unrewarded. Plus, your success will show exactly how much of a badass you really are.