What once was scarlet letters with hand-dipped ink has now become a late-night slide into the DMs with three casual letters: “wyd?” Love languages and manners of expressions have changed over time,both in wording and effort. Humans have continuously evolved the ways we show affection, devotion and interest, reflecting our cultural and technological changes.Â
In the past, expressing love often meant taking a risk. Love letters were carefully crafted, filled with intention and emotion that sometimes took weeks to deliver. Grand gestures like poetry or public declarations were ways of proving sincerity, as to love someone meant inventing time, vulnerability and creativity. The effort itself carried meaning. Â
Today, flirting and affection look very different. A heart-eye emoji under a TikTok post, a casual like of an instagram story or a mass-snap on Snapchat has become the modern equivalent of a romantic “pursuit”. While these gestures are quick, accessible and might work (on the surface level), they also blur the line between genuine interest and passive attention. When affection is reduced to a double tap or comment, it raises the question of whether expressing love has become easier, or just less meaningful?
Social media has reshaped not only how we communicate love, but how often we do it. It normalizes low effort and allows anyone to quickly lead someone on, without genuine meaning to it. Words like “I love you” are used more freely, casually or even ironically. For teenagers and young adults, constant digital messaging is the largest form of communication between two lovers, a clear difference from the face-to-face effort of doing something fun and out of the ordinary.
With that being said, it doesn’t mean modern love isn’t deep or real; in many cases, it truly is. However, getting someone’s attention or liking someone used to mean more, feeling more genuine and less influenced by social media posts, or dare I say “thraps.” Today, people have more opportunities than ever to express love in meaningful ways, but many choose not to.Â
At the end of the day, we have not lost love, only adapted it. While some people have embraced modern love by going above and beyond to show their efforts in new ways, it’s clear that as a generation, we’ve also grown a bit lazy.. Whether through ink-stained pages or bright phone screens, the desire to be seen, chosen and understood remains the same. The challenge now is finding ways to bring intention back expressions of love beyond a swipe.Â