No matter where you find yourself in your curly hair journey we have all experienced the vicious cycle of hair care. You have a wash day that leaves your curls looking better than you thought possible and the next thing you know you went to sleep or left your house into the Florida humidity and your curls are ruined. So you recreate your entire washday in hopes that your curls will look the same and they unfortunately don’t. There is no instruction manual for curly hair and a hair routine is rarely a one size fits all situation. Everyone’s hair has different needs and everyone has different goals for their hair. Some girls prioritize curl definition, others prefer volume, some aspire to grow long curly locks while others are enjoying their freshly cut bob. Caring for your curly hair is not an easy job and there is so much information online it can get confusing, but in my eyes it is so worth it. After years of experimenting with products, techniques and routines I have found what works for me and what are things I wish I knew when I started.
To Preface
Before I get into it I want to emphasize that these are all things that work best for me. Your hair routine depends on so many different factors like porosity, texture, thickness, climate and breakage to name a few. My hair specifically is a mix of wavy and curly strands (if you know about the curly hair types I’m a mix of 2c and 3a) and low porosity (my hair likes to resist moisture and product buildup is easier) and years of treating it like it is straight with aggressive brushing. So my best advice is to not expect that my routine or anyone else’s routine is going to give you the same exact results because everyone has a routine unique for them!
There is No “Perfect” Routine
A lot of us can make the mistake of thinking there is one perfect routine out there that will change our curly haired life forever but I don’t believe that to be true. As I said before our hair has needs and they change all the time. One month your hair may need a lot of moisture in our products and the next month your hair can’t stand any more moisture and needs much more protein products. Curly hair actually takes a bit of research but once you start to understand your hair more it becomes second nature and you start to figure out your routine more. What works for you one week might simply not work for you another week, and that is okay! Just like how other people’s routines may not work for you, last week’s routine may not work for you right now either.
Focus on Technique Over Products
Now that we have recognized and accepted that our curly hair is constantly evolving we need to talk about your technique. I started my curly hair journey in 2019 and when I suddenly found myself in my house with a lot of free time in 2020 I scoured Youtube to find everything there was to learn about curly hair. It’s safe to say that I fell face first down a rabbit hole. There is so much to learn and so much contradicting information because sometimes people just do random stuff and if it works for your hair you just roll with it. It’s easy to think the next product will fix everything and while products definitely matter, I learned that how you use them matters even more.
Here are some small changes that made a difference for me:
- Applying products on soaking wet hair instead of damp
- Using less product than I thought I needed (rubbing the product in your hands helps emulsify hair products)
- Brushing all the hair product through, doing ribbon curls (brush technique) and then scrunching
- Plopping my hair in a cotton t-shirt for 15 to 20 minutes
- Then blowdry my hair with a diffuser attachment
At first, I wasn’t sure if anything was working but once I stuck with these changes for a bit I started seeing real results.
Frizz Isn’t the Enemy
For the longest time, I thought frizz was my nemesis. But the truth is, frizz is there to add some spice to your hair. A little bit of frizz is completely normal because it’s just a part of having curly hair. Trying to eliminate frizz completely usually led me to overwhelming my hair with product, which made it feel heavy and look limp. Once I accepted that some frizz is okay, my hair actually started looking better. Instead of aiming for “perfect” curls, I embraced the frizz that came with volume. If you notice abnormal frizz then that could be an indicator of dryness or damage. As you advance in your curly hair journey the frizz will start to minimize and it won’t bother you nearly as much as it used to.
Your Hair Will Change
A few years after I joined the curly hair bandwagon it seemed like a lot of people were trying to catch a ride too and I knew there was going to be so much new information and hacks for curly hair. When I began it felt hard to get started and I didn’t realize that your hair would just change even after doing the same routine. Since our community has greatly expanded, social media has allowed everyone to connect over common struggles and factors that are just out of control:
- The weather/humidity (they weren’t kidding when they called it the swamp)
- Stress or lifestyle changes
- Hormones (yes, you read that right, some women found their hair got curlier or straighter depending on hormonal changes)
- A bad haircut (tragic)
There were times when I felt like I had finally figured everything out only for my hair to suddenly stop cooperating. Unfortunately, curly hair isn’t something you “solve” once. It’s like a never ending puzzle that you somehow keep finding a new piece for.
Getting the Basics
At one point, my routine had way too many steps. Multiple products, multiple techniques, constantly trying to get every curl to look the same. It wasn’t making my hair better, it was just making the process more complicated and I ended up spending three hours doing my hair routine. Over time, I simplified everything and got my essentials. Here are a few of my essentials to inspire you:
- A cotton t-shirt to dry my hair (if you are fancy you can get a microfiber towel)
- A good detangling brush (detangling knots is the worst)
- The Denman brush or the Bounce Curl brush (depends on hair type it helps definition)
- A scalp scrubber/massager (helps get rid of product buildup and promotes hair growth)
- A silk scrunchie + silk bonnet (to protect your hair as you sleep)
- Diffuser attachment for blowdryer (highly recommend if you blowdry your hair)
- A clarifying shampoo (alternate with your regular shampoo to reduce product buildup)
- A good gel (I use the Ouidad Advanced Climate Control Heat Humidity Gel)
- Hair oil (use when your hair is dry to break gel cast)
Whenever you make changes to your hair routine, it’s best to avoid switching too many things at once. Give your new routine a few weeks to see how your hair responds because it will be easier to figure out what’s actually working and what’s not.
It’s About What Works for You
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is that curly hair is personal. There’s no single routine, no universal product and no one “right” way to do it. What matters is finding what works for you even if it looks completely different from what works for someone else. Some days your curls will cooperate. Other days they won’t. At the end of the day, figuring out your curly hair isn’t about perfection it’s about understanding it a little more over time and it’s rewarding to see all your growth. Curly hair takes trial and error, patience and a little bit of letting go of the idea that your hair has to look a certain way. But once you start paying attention to what works for you, it gets a lot easier and a lot more fun.