Can you believe it’s already 2016? It’s a new year, a new beginning and a new chance for more amazing music. (Notice the keyword: new.) Last year brought us so many great songs that it’s hard to single out my favorites. On the other hand, last year also brought us so many songs that were good at first – or never at all – but progressively got worse once you heard them 100 times.
From the biggest hits of 2015 to the songs that make you say, “Hold up – did that really come out last year?” I’m counting down the 25 songs that should stay out of the New Year.
Yes, Adele, you should be sorry – mostly for your over-hyped album but also for subjecting me to hearing your sung apology 24/7 in November.
2. “Can’t Feel My Face” – The Weeknd
What’s odd is that I love the bridge of this song but loathe all the other parts. Can we agree to only play “The Hills” from now on or skip Abel altogether?
3. “The Hanging Tree (feat. Jennifer Lawrence)” – James Newton Howard
To whoever sold their soul and told the Hunger Games folks that this would be an excellent song to remix and send to radio stations, I want a formal apology mailed to my doorstep. This is the “Cups” song all over again – except without a catchy tune.
4. “Same Old Love”/ “Good For You” – Selena Gomez
Thankfully Gomez heeded my advice and made “Hands To Myself,” arguably her best work on Revival, her new single. Unfortunately for my ears, these two songs are still getting airtime.
5. “Pretty Girls” – Britney Spears & Iggy Azalea
And the biggest flop of 2015 goes to… Briggy! No need for an acceptance speech, ladies; your BBMA performance was enough.
6. “Lean On (feat. MØ)” – Major Lazer & DJ Snake
I physically feel my ears bleed each time this song comes on the radio – why 105.3, why? Diplo, please stick to perfecting Justin Bieber songs.
7. “Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae)” – Silentó
The Stanky Legg should’ve stayed in 2008, nonetheless 2015. (Fun fact: This past October, Silentó showed up at my old high school’s homecoming dance. So, to tell you the truth, I may or may not be a little bitter.)
8. “Cool For The Summer” – Demi Lovato
Lovato’s not-so-obvious remake of Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl” was a hit last summer, much to my dismay. I did tell my mother, Demi – I told her to switch the station.
9. “See You Again (feat. Charlie Puth)” – Wiz Khalifa
Yes, the final scene of Furious 7 is heartbreaking. Yes, the song fits perfectly with the narrative. Yes, Charlie Puth has a weird eyebrow. And yes, this song has gotten way too much airtime.
“Let them say what they say, cause I’m about to put them all away – woooo! I got one less pro-” crap, I do that every time.
*Hears song on the radio once.* “Hmm, this is a funky beat.” *Hears song on the radio twice.* “Yeah, I think I like this.” *Sees gifs on Twitter.* “Aw, Drake is so funny with his dancing.” *Sees gifs on Twitter, again.* “Okay, I think people may like this a bit much.” *Sees entire Twitter, Facebook and Instagram dashboards full of song.* “This needs to stop.” *Hears song on the radio for 124th time.* “Dear sweet baby Jesus, Mary and Joseph in Bethlehem, make it stop.”
12. “B**** Better Have My Money” – Rihanna
Earth to RiRi – we can’t pay you what we owe you if you still haven’t released your new album. Where it at? Where it at? Where it at? Brrap, brrap, brrap.
13. “Take Your Time” – Sam Hunt
This song is the “UpTown Funk” of country radio, except it’s not good with choreography. I’m sure country rap – or “hick-hop” – has its place somewhere in the world, but not anywhere near me.
14. “Renegades” – X Ambassadors
Dear alternative radio stations and car commercials, let us live for two minutes without hearing you capitalize on this song. Sincerely, America.
No, just no.
16. “Thinking Out Loud” – Ed Sheeran
I was super pumped about this song when I first heard Sheeran sing it acoustically before X came out. But, like everything else pure and good in the world, the radio ruined it.
This song needs to stay in 2015 just so I don’t have to see another performance of Jonas tied in plastic chains and surrounded by models in police outfits.
18. “Uma Thurman” – Fall Out Boy
I can only take the waily, shrieky voice Patrick Stump sings in nowadays in small doses. So accordingly, this song is a big no bueno.
19. “Fight Song” – Rachel Platten
On one hand, I feel bad hating this song because it’s inspirational to a lot of people. On the other hand, it’s just so darn annoying.
20. “Worth It” – Fifth Harmony
Fifth Harmony – or Fifth Unison, à la L.A. Reid – is overrated in every possible way, just like the trumpets they stole from Jason Derulo for this song.
21. “Stressed Out” – twenty one pilots
Yes, we know your name is Blurryface and you care what we think. However, alternative radio is too obsessed with you so you’re no longer welcome.
I like the verses of this song, but for some reason the chorus (even though it’s only five words) irks me on every listen. (Also – whenever he does a live performance, his back-up singer is annoying AF. Girl, stop doing the hula to a country song.)
23. “Used To Love You” – Gwen Stefani
This song is on my list just for the fact she made me watch three minutes and 47 seconds of:
24. “Happy” – Pharrell Williams
Almost three years later, I still Selena Gomez-face every time “Happy” comes on the radio.
This album came out in 2014 – that’s two years ago, people. If you aren’t going to play “All You Had To Do Was Stay” or “How You Get The Girl,” don’t play any songs off 1989 at all.
Which songs do you wish would stay in 2015? Do you agree with my list, or do you think I should’ve added a Bieber song? Tweet me @courtnerz and tell me your favorite or least favorite songs of last year.
Photo credits: thesource.com, giphy.com, tumblr.com