“Don’t worry! You’ll meet someone when you least expect it!”
I used to cringe every time I’d hear those words. Thank you, overly auspicious friend, for that
wise sliver of relationship gold, but I’ve tried that and it’s still not working. I’ve taken the “I’m
over it, I will just die alone” attitude, the “You know what? I’m too good for these boys!” attitude
and even the “What’s wrong with me?” attitude. And they’ve all gotten me nowhere.
What’s wrong with all us girls out there who are trying to do everything right, but end up doing
everything so, so wrong?
It comes down to that one key word: trying. We are all trying way too hard.
Recently, I’ve realized that my friend’s annoying, pain-in-the-butt advice actually had some
validity.
It’s the trying that leads us astray. There’s no harm in a little I-just-met-the-cutest-boy-ever
excitement, but when that excitement turns into obsession, the problems begin. We get so
wrapped up in our “new found love” that we overanalyze everything, constantly wondering when
he will text you, perfectly timing your text back, hoping to see him out at the bar he frequents,
hoping to see him anywhere…
Stop right there. Just because some hottie waltzes into Balls long enough to sloppily write down
your number on a napkin doesn’t necessarily mean that you should give him a ton of time and
thought. He’s most likely not doing the same for you. He’s out living his own life, and you should
follow his example.
There’s really only one step to finding Mr. Perfect: be satisfied and happy with your own life.
You need to have fulfillment. Find those things in your life that you truly love to do, and then
do them. Whether it’s a job, internship, school organization, underwater basket weaving, I don’t
care, it just needs to be something that no boy will ever take priority over in your life. If you don’t
have a passion, make it your mission to find one.
And here’s the best part: once you start just being happy, the boys come rolling in.
You know that feeling you get when a boy comes on too strong, seeming desperate? When no
amount of $2 doubles could possible make you want him? Well, boys can sense that desperation
in girls as well. They can tell when a girl is “on the prowl,” frantically looking for someone to fill
the void, and it’s a turn-off. Whether you two have just met or have been hooking up for months,
it makes no difference; they’ll notice when your vulture-like talons start clawing at them.
The girls that find Mr. Perfect are the ones who don’t need a man to be happy. They have all the
self-fulfillment and happiness that they need. A guy is just the cherry on top.
So, collegiettes, go out and find fulfillment in your life! Once you do, the rest will fall into place.
And don’t worry! You’ll find him when you least expect it.