It’s finally fall-ish in Gainesville; the weather is cooler, the leaves are sort of changing, Dunkin is pulling out their pumpkin spiced everything and that can only mean one thing. Cuffing season is upon us.
For those who don’t know what cuffing season is, Urban Dictionary defines it as:
Now don’t get me wrong. Snuggling up with your S.O. and most likely finishing the second season of Stranger Things (if you haven’t already) sounds like a good autumn night spent. But it’s important to protect yourself from the countless suitors knocking down your door. And trust me here, people, it’s exhausting having to turn down so many offers just because I don’t have enough time.
As I think about it, I am left wondering who needs someone else to spend time with you when it is much better binge watching every show known to man by yourself? Amiright, ladies?
And don’t even get me started on dating. I didn’t even want fun dates to the trampoline place, cool concerts at High Dive or cute nights spend walking around town (and hopefully ending up at Dragonfly).
And so what? With all this inconsistent weather, why would I take my chances of finding a stable and healthy relationship? It’s going to be hot again within the next month, so why spend the minimal amount of cool weather with your S.O. when you can fall asleep in your bed for hours and enjoy the weather solo with a good hammocking sesh? It just doesn’t make sense.
I’m just too busy finding myself through the numerous BuzzFeed quizzes I take to tell me what kind of bread I am. If that isn’t finding your true self, then I don’t know what is. Boys, just take a break. Me and the other singles out there are choosing this lifestyle.
There are so many activities and other things you can enjoy alone. It is infinitely easier finding a single seat in Newell than a table for me and my boo.
Ladies and gents, there will be several cuffing seasons in the future, so why rush this one? Spend some time alone and enjoy it! Read the book you’ve been eyeing for a year but never found the time to read it! Go pick some fruit! Hunt bigfoot!
Whatever you do, just remember that whether you do it alone or with your S.O., do what makes you happy. Cuffing season may come and go, but your well-being is here to stay. The pressure is real to find someone this time of year. In good conscious I can’t even say I don’t get it, cause I do. Of course this season, and might I add every season, life always looks more fun when you get to do cute things with your crush.
Recently, I watched the movie How To Be Single. It was wildly funny and inappropriate (thanks to the comedy genius of Rebel Wilson). Through dozens of club scenes, the movie obviously was attempting to empower the idea of being single.
But as the movie progressed, it took on some real issues. I won’t spoil it for anyone who has yet to see it (and if you haven’t, stopping reading this ASAP and watch. I’ll wait!) — but the main character, Alice, finds out her true self throughout spells of being in and out of relationships. Toward the end, Alice finally achieves what she has been longing to do while serving up some truth. In her final monologue, Dakota Johnson who plays Alice says in a voice over:
“The thing about being single is, you should cherish it. Because, in a week, or a lifetime, of being alone, you may only get one moment. One moment, when you’re not tied up in a relationship with anyone. A parent, a pet, a sibling, a friend. One moment, when you stand on your own. Really, truly single. And then, it’s gone.”
So if cuffing season, or any season, has you hung-up on being with someone, I beg you to be encouraged through a time of pure singleness. Even if that means using an incredible amount of satire.