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Being the Third Wheel: 5 Tips on How to Cope and Still Keep Your Best Friend

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UFL chapter.

Your best friend has a new boyfriend. Don’t worry; we’ve all been there. Between their oogling and constant displays of affection, it’s hard to get a word in edgewise and ignore the fact that you’re single. Of course you still want to spend time with your partner in crime, but I’m sure her new man doesn’t appreciate you crashing their dates. So for your own sanity, here are a few tips with how to deal with being that awkward third wheel.

1. Dates are off limits
No matter now many times your friend tries to convince you it won’t be awkward, it will be. Politely decline on one-on-one dinner and movie dates. Instead of being left alone with the lovebirds, suggest activities that call for a big group. But if there is no way out of going to a movie with the happy couple, invite a fourth wheel to come with you.

2. Become friends with her man 
Don’t be jealous of the boyfriend for monopolizing her time. It will be far less awkward to spend time with your bestie if you become friends with her man as well. You won’t feel like you are constantly imposing on their time if you actually understand the inside jokes. And hey, maybe he will introduce you to his hot roommate once he gets to know you.

3. Don’t take sides 
Young love is bound to have its problems, but when you are caught in the middle of their first big fight, run! Nothing is more awkward than being trapped in a room with a feuding couple. They are bound to ask your opinion, and that never ends well. So when you sense there might be a shouting match, try to excuse yourself from the room to give them some time to work it out. 

4. Don’t be afraid to change the subject 
Does her constant relationship talk still make you feel like the third wheel even when it’s just the two of you? It’s okay to chance the subject. It’s better to move on in the conversation than get in trouble for not paying attention to her. As her best friend, you are there to listen to her when she needs you, but hearing the same story over and over again can make any single lady annoyed. Just remember: you can’t blame the girl for being in love, so don’t get snappy when you tell her you want to talk about something else.

5. Don’t be offended 
Too often girls lose touch with their best friend over a guy. Don’t be offended if they want to spend some alone time together. But more importantly, don’t think you’ve been replaced. If you’ve gone too long without seeing your pal, let her know. Chances are she misses spending time with you, too.

So to all the single ladies out there, don’t fret. Although it might be awkward sometimes to make some room for the new guy in your friends life, you can always relish in the fact that you are still single and ready to mingle. 

Cara oversees Her Campus Media's community department and serves as strategic lead for the expansion, development and management of all HCM communities, including the Her Campus Chapter Network, InfluenceHer Collective, College Fashionista, Spoon University, Campus Trendsetters, alumni and high school. She works closely with company leadership to develop new community-related sales offerings and the Integrated Marketing team to support all community-focused client marketing programs from end to end. Cara has experience working with high-profile talent, such as Jessica Alba, Andrew Yang, Amber Tamblyn, Aja Naomi King, Troian Bellisario, Jessica Marie Garcia, Nico Tortorella, Nastia Liukin, Rebecca Minkoff, Cecile Richards and Samantha Power, as well as brands like Coca-Cola, L'Oréal Paris, The New York Times, HBO, Uber, H&M and more. Having been a part of the HC family since 2011, Cara served as Campus Correspondent of the HC chapter at the University of Florida where she studied journalism, women’s studies and leadership. A New Yorker turned Floridian, Cara has a Friends quote for any situation. You can usually find her with her friends and family at the beach, a concert or live sports event or binge-watching Grey's Anatomy or Sons of Anarchy. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter @thecararose.