Despite Valentine’s Day being a wonderful excuse to be romantic, it also happens to be one of the most anticlimactic and pressured days on the social calendar. Whether your relationship is blissful or hanging by a thread, everyone seems a little on edge on Valentine’s. With the whole world buzzing on social media and a new theory that love doesn’t exist if other people can’t see it, it is impossible to escape Facebook photos of gorgeous flowers, handwritten cards and expensive meals, completely outdoing your boyfriend’s half hearted attempt at making you breakfast.
The truly romantic gestures are the simplest, It is far better to have someone who will bring you a cup of tea in the morning than who will buy you the most expensive flowers. Valentine’s Day is about showing your appreciation for the one you love, so cut your man some slack and just enjoy the day. Unfortunately, as much as we wish they were, guys are not mind readers and we often let little insignificant things ruin our day so here is a list of reminders composed by the HC UEA team to ensure that your Valentine’s Day is stress free with as little drama as possible…
Do not set your expectations too high
Valentine’s Day has become the next New Years in the sense that we set our expectations so incredibly high that the reality is bound to fall short. Unfortunately, there is some truth to the theory that romantic comedies have ruined our love lives and set our boyfriends up to fail on Valentine’s day because essentially they cannot compete. We all have unrealistic expectations that Ryan Gosling is going to build us our dream house and take us for a boat ride around the lake, or that the guy from Love Actually is going to knock on the door in the snow and hold up signs telling us how perfect we are.
We’re all students here which means that if you’re lucky enough to have a guy that wants you to be his Valentine, you can expect a handmade card and a home cooked meal, and that should be perfect. Girls tend to be much more inclined to Valentine’s Day than boys so if he’s making an effort, even if it’s in the simplest form, he’s doing it for you, so enjoy it and appreciate it.
Do not send mixed signals
We’ve all been guilty of playing games on the run up to Valentine’s day: Saying the opposite of what you mean and then being visibly disappointed when they get it wrong. If you ‘play it cool’ and insist that flowers aren’t important and that you don’t want them, when Valentine’s day rolls around you will not get flowers. Ashton Kutcher may have got it right in basically every chick flick he’s ever been in but those films were written by women. Mixed signals rarely work, trust us! If you want flowers, tell him. Your guy is only human, don’t expect him to understand the female mind, we barely understand it ourselves!!
Compromise
Compromise is such an important aspect of Valentine’s Day that people rarely seem to acknowledge. Just as romantic gestures are important to you, your partner might have strong feelings against them, so meet them halfway. If one of you loves all things Valentine’s Day related and the other hates it, why not a healthy compromise where you’re both happy? A low key, intimate but romantic day with just the two of you.
Be patient
People often learn by trial and error so in order for him to get it right, it might take a while and there might be a few rocky Valentine’s Day patches where he buys you the wrong sized underwear or makes you an inedible meal…Be patient with him. If you think that it could last and you know that you’re with a wonderful person, enjoy the quirks whilst subtly leading them on the right road to your approval…at least they’re putting in the effort!
Don’t rub your friends’ noses in it
This is quite possibly the most important point of all; we have ALL been single on Valentine’s Day or have been going through a hard one. The only thing that makes this worse is the feeling that Valentine’s Day is on steroids around you. Our newsfeeds are full of filtered photos of flowers, couples kissing and proposals, and what do we have? Betty Crocker’s chocolate fudge icing and a spoon. As happy as you are in your relationship, don’t rub it in your friends’ faces, it’s much more special if it’s just between you and your partner, and most importantly you won’t make your friends feel rubbish.
With these points in mind, enjoy your Valentine’s Day with your loved one and don’t let the little things overshadow his efforts, he’s only human!