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Happy Women’s History Month! The time has come to celebrate the beauty of girlhood, those who came before us, and the many who continue to dismantle the patriarchy in the present day. The feminists who we celebrate this month (and every month!) battled to ensure that women — and every person — are able to freely express themselves in a society where criticism is so prevalent. Intersectional feminism is imperative in this discussion because it gives people the freedom to present themselves however they want, whether that would be androgynous, feminine, masculine, or a combination of all three.
You may have heard these expressions if you’re on TikTok, and even the terms Divine Feminine and feminine energy. But what do they even mean?
The divine feminine in spirituality refers to a state of self, or energy, people present that is resilient, empathetic, patient, dynamic and creative. It’s important to emphasize that although these are gendered terms, they are not restricted to a certain gender or how one looks! This energy lives in harmony with masculine energy, and there is a balance of both in everyone. It can be seen in ancient figures like Aphrodite and Shakti, and looks like getting in touch with your emotions, connecting with other people, and being confident in your sexuality. But how can we emphasize this Divine Feminine in everyday life? For me, this means getting in touch with what makes me feel feminine, creative, and relaxed.
Find your style and what makes you feel pretty!
Loving yourself is hard, but a good first step is making time for yourself to feel good. This self-love is in itself an act of divine femininity. Recently, I’ve found that searching for my style is a fun way to explore this. My current go-to look is wearing something comfy, and a whole bunch of my mom’s jewelry she lets me borrow. I always feel like she’s with me when I wear these, plus it’s fun to have sparkly bracelets and rings (Gold metal girlie for life!). It calls me back to playing dress-up in my mom’s clothes with my sister as a kid, and pretending to be an adult before I had to grow up. Getting in touch with things that bring back memories of my childhood remind me how far I have come and how resilient I am, an important aspect of the Divine Feminine.
To further embrace this, one of my favorite tricks to finding my style is finding a fragrance that I feel expresses my personality. According to Frontiers for Young Minds, smells are connected to memory, which is why when we smell a certain scent it can bring us back to a specific stage in life. I bounced from perfume to perfume in high school, but now I use one that reminds me of my mom and auntie from Hawaii, and hugging them at family dinners as a little girl. Called Gucci Bloom Profumo di Fiori Eau, it’s tropical and floral but not heady, and is an everyday part of my style. It’s so fun to take a trip to Sephora in downtown Santa Barbara to find what you think expresses your personality, and furthermore helps you feel confident.
Validate and lend a listening ear to the women around you
For Women’s History Month (and every month!), we should be uplifting the powerful, beautiful women around us. Feminine energy emphasizes being empathetic, and this means listening to those around us. Until you are tuned in and pay attention to the women in your life, you will never know what they have gone through.
For example, whenever I’m in the car with my mom on a long drive, she always drops the craziest lore on my younger sister, like past romance, childhood loves and hurts, and what adulthood means to her. My sister and I listening to my mom gives her the space to share the important things she has gone through that makes her the amazing human she is. Building this deeper connection not just on the basis of being family, but bonding over being a woman and what that life means makes me feel in touch with feminine energy.
Celebrate girlhood.
On the aspect of bonding over being women, let’s celebrate girlhood! The girls I have met and became close with in college are some of the most lovely people I have met. We have so much fun together, whether it’s cute themed picnics, beach days, brunch downtown, or getting ready to go out, I feel so comforted and safe with them. This community that we built allows me to be who I am, and I feel safe enough to be in this feminine state of self, and share emotions.
According to Kwantlen Polytechnic University, the people and environment we surround ourselves with shape our personality. This is why celebrating the beautiful friendships we have fostered is so important. Celebrate being women with your girls, and you will feel in touch with your emotions and have a great time doing it!
Read feminist literature.
There’s nothing like reading a book and feeling seen. Sylvia Plath’s fig tree analogy, anyone? Reading words and recognizing that an author who wrote this hundreds of years ago was going through the same situations you were as a woman in her society is an experience like no other, and yet another great way to connect with your femininity and let that Divine Feminine state of self come into existence. Some of my favorite feminist authors include Maya Angelou, Jane Austen (Pride & Prejudice lover for life), Sandra Cisernos, and Amy Tan, but there are so many amazing stories out there that are waiting to be read! Our lib is a great resource for Gauchos who plan to read more feminist works and need a place to start.
There is nothing against not wanting to be feminine, but I remember as a kid wanting to dress so-called “girly,” and feeling like I couldn’t because I needed to be different. In elementary school, it was cool to be “not like the other girls,” but now as a 19-year-old, I have a very different perspective. The women I know in my life are kind, pretty, funny, have cute outfits, and wear bows in their hair. Why wouldn’t I want to be like them! Being a feminist is recognizing the beauty in someone else, and not just physically, but spiritually too. I’ve found that the people I admire are mirrors that point back to myself, and reflect what I feel is missing in my life.
It’s cool to have masculine traits and still want to present yourself as feminine too. Similar to yin and yang, both energies are always present and in balance. Like Maya Angelou says, “A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She goes where she will without pretense and arrives at her destination prepared to be herself and herself only.”
Celebrate Women’s History Month by reflecting and exploring what being in the Divine Feminine means to you and uplift those around you. When we embrace the feminine energy that resides in us all, we become that much more connected with the wonderful people around us, and the wonderfulness in ourselves.