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An Open Letter to the One I Let Get Away

Hey there,

You know, when I met you I didn’t think I was going to like you as much as I did. You sat down near me in section and we started talking, and pretty soon I found myself looking forward to going to section each week just to see you. I was crushing on you so hard. For awhile there I even thought maybe you felt the same. We exchanged numbers after class one day, and you have no idea how much that even meant to me. There was only one minor issue: my anxiety. There were so many times I just wanted to text you just to talk, but changed my mind out of fear. Because of that, I really only ever texted you about school stuff, which I imagine came off as being pretty disinterested.

Now here we are, we have this acquaintanceship and you’re with someone else. Maybe if I hadn’t been so hesitant and maybe if I hadn’t feared rejection so much, just maybe you would be mine. Nothing is guaranteed though, I guess. For all I know, you were never interested in me like that in the first place. Maybe I completely misread all of the signs from the beginning. I don’t know. I guess a part of me is just hopeful. I am glad to see you happy with someone now, though. I’ve moved past my little crush, and am moving forward with my life, away from wondering about what could have been. I see you as just my friend, which we’re probably better off as honestly. It’s a little funny though to think that someone you used to think so much about is now just another person you know. It’s a part of life.

I hope you take care, and I look forward to seeing where our lives go from here. I wish you all the best.

Deyana Gorman is a second year pre-biology major at the University of California Santa Barbara from Simi Valley, California. Outside of writing for Her Campus, Deyana can usually be found watching her favorite youtubers, hanging out with friends, playing video games, brushing up on her photography skills, or doing activities with her sorority sisters. She plans on one day studying abroad in Italy, Ireland, and Australia as well as going on road trip adventures throughout California.
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