Flashback to April 2021: Disneyland and California Adventure reopen at 15% capacity after a year-long closure for the COVID-19 pandemic. New reservation systems are in place, masks and social distancing are enforced and floods of Disney Adults break through the gates in choked sobs as they ~finally~ set foot on Disney property again — a long-awaited relapse into their gateway drug, if you will.
At this time, the dreaded “Disney Adult” label emerged as images of these sobbing Disney guests surfaced online (no, I didn’t make that up — people actually cried). According to one definition in the Urban Dictionary, the Disney Adult is, “a millennial adult…that can’t stop talking about Disney, including the movies and the parks…They are obsessed with everything Disney and probably have a Mickey Mouse bumper sticker and/or tattoo. One of the most terrifyingly intense people you’ll ever encounter.”
As you have probably gathered, there’s a notably negative connotation working with this term. But take notice, there’s a fine line between being a Disney fan and becoming everyone’s worst nightmare because your entire life revolves Disney. Nervous you may be one of these fantasy fanatics? Take a look below to see if you’ve become the dreaded…Disney Adult:
- How many mickey ears do you own?
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If it’s over four, then we have a problem. Boundaries are an important part of life. Set some for yourself.
- Are you an annual pass-holder at Disneyland?
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Owning a pass in and of itself isn’t a problem, it’s the kind of pass that points towards a Disney addiction. Do you have the basic level, Southern California pass? Or did you splurge on the $1600 premium pass? If you answered yes to the second question…You’re on your own.
- How often do you talk about Disney?
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Some people have an amazing aptitude for tying Disney into. Every. Single. Conversation. Some words of advice: Don’t be that person.
Your aunt wants to know how school is going, she doesn’t need to know how close the Disneyland park is to your campus. Especially not down to the minute and mile.
- Have you “Disneybounded”? (Do you even know what that is?)
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I will accept dressing up as a Disney character on Halloween, but any other day is unacceptable. And to be clear, visiting Disneyland in Disneybounding clothes is also ~unacceptable~.
Don’t even try to be subtle about it. We know what you’re doing. We all know.
- Do you know the lyrics to all of the Disney Princess songs?
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Complete transparency, I LOVE to sing Disney songs in the car when I have a long drive ahead of me, but I still don’t have all of the Disney movie soundtracks memorized. If you’ve nailed the lyrics to even the most obscure songs, you’re probably a Disney Adult. Sorry, not sorry.
- Are you the only adult in the theater for Disney animated movies?
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Okay, we were all the stand-out adults for Incredibles 2 and Finding Dory. That was to be expected with the lengthy hiatus between installments — i.e. totally not our fault. But what about Planes? Inside Out? Onward? How about the upcoming Elemental movie? Will you be there on opening night? Oh, you won’t? LIAR!
- Is your dream wedding or honeymoon destination at Disney?
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If your dream Disney wedding-doubled-honeymoon is going to cost more than my entire college education, then I have nothing left to say to you. Do better.
- would someone know you’re a Disney fan from your house and/or bedroom?
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The equivalent of walking into a crazy cat lady’s apartment: Cats everywhere. Eyes following your every move. Toys and scratching posts lining the room. But in this case, it’s Disney posters lining the wall, Disneyland souvenirs and trinkets dusted across every flat surface and Disney-themed rooms throughout the house.
Don’t make guests sleep under the watchful eye of your Goofy poster. It’s just creepy.
If you failed more than half of the checklist items, I’m afraid I have some bad news for you…You may be a Disney Adult. Never fear, there are proven treatments for this condition: stop crying when you step foot in Disneyland, don’t plan on wasting 50k on a Disney World wedding and consider removing the Annual Pass bumper sticker from your car .
Disney was created for people of all ages to find entertainment, fun, friendship and escape from the stress of the real world, so try not to take it so seriously. Make memories and enjoy the magic around you! It’s what Walt would’ve wanted…probably.