The leaves have fallen, the stores have arranged their Christmas sections and “Sweater Weather” by The Neighborhood is your most-played song on Spotify. It’s that time of year: Thanksgiving season. Which also means family gathering season. If you’re anything like me, you’re feeling complicated enthusiasm toward spending an entire evening with long-lost cousins and strange aunts. Relatives can be as stressful as they are entertaining, just as Thanksgiving can be as draining as it is intimate.
As someone with years of holiday dinner question-dodging and escape experience, here are my five tips for surviving family gatherings:
- MAKE YOURSELF BUSY: HELP SET UP
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By keeping yourself occupied, whether you’re helping out in the kitchen or setting the table, you’ll be too busy to engage in any demanding conversations. Setting up will also give you some breathing room to get comfortable. Walk around with oven mitts on your hands at all times, and nobody will question you. Your relatives might even compliment your excellent work ethic!
- SIT NEXT TO YOUR CLOSEST FAMILY MEMBERS
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We all have that designated sibling or cousin best friend, and there’s no shame in using them as a crutch. Having a buddy to struggle through awkward small talk and pointed interrogations will make your night infinitely easier (and more fun). You’ll feel much less tired by the evening’s end if you’re only doing fifty percent of the talking.
- DON’T TALK POLITICS
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What is it about dinner tables and relatives that makes it impossible to resist politics? I couldn’t tell you, but I can promise that it’s a bad idea. And if someone else brings up something you disagree with? Don’t take the bait! You’ll only rile everyone up. Keep your phone handy and release your rage through Twitter or Snapchat. Someone out there is bound to relate to your rants.
- DO THE ASKING
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The best way to avoid answering uncomfortable questions about your career prospects or future spouse is to do the asking. Sure, you might have to sit through your uncle’s eccentric college stories, but a little boredom is worth saving face. Go ahead and turn the tables!
- KEEP THOSE ESCAPE EXCUSES HANDY
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You have a final due the Monday after break? Well, suddenly you’re so studious that you need to study during Thanksgiving! Maybe your dog can’t be left alone for too long and needs his evening walk. Or maybe you ate way too much turkey and pumpkin pie, and have no choice but to turn in early. Whatever excuse fits your story. There’s no need to feel embarrassed when caring for your well-being.
I hope these five tips keep your Thanksgiving from feeling like a chore! Remember: it’s only one night of the year. You’ve got this.