As a kid, Valentine’s Day was the day where my parents would come home with boxes of chocolate for each member of the family. Dinner would wrap up, and we would all head to the living room and enter a true pink and red candyland. My brothers and I would compare what types of chocolate we were gifted, often begging to trade because they were in fact, not all the same. It was a lovey-dovey Halloween in February, a family affair to say the least.
But, as I got older, a social pressure began to develop around the day marked February 14th. As boys entered the scene and dating was no longer a fantasy in the movies, I began to question, “What am I supposed to do on Valentine’s Day?” Exchange chocolate boxes with my family? Where is the person I’m supposed to be sharing this day with? In return, boys remained in the scene but dating was not a fantasy I ever experienced. So, I was left entering the fantasy through binging my favorite rom-coms with my girlfriends as we questioned where the heck our prince charming was and shoved our faces with the chocolates we were never gifted, but rather purchased ourselves. This decision – a rather popular one – is merely a reaction to a set of expectations that fall in line with the day of love. A day where couples soar and all the single ladies question why their dating lives are nonexistent. But, what if we reinvented Valentine’s Day to be a day of self-love just as it is a day of loving that very special person? A day of loving the people that energize you, that make you the best version of yourself? Past just a romantic interest?
I think back to the family affair of Valentine’s Day that I had experienced all of my life. My parents had been doing it all along. Instead of taking the night off and enjoying a romantic night out in Los Angeles, just the two of them, they reinvented Valentine’s Day. They made it a day of love for all five of us. And that is what we should all be doing. This does not take away from the beautiful, gooey energy that lingers on this special day. But rather, it adds more to the picture: it encourages love in each regard, whether you are single, alone, deeply in love or going through one of the most rough patches of your life. Valentine’s Day is a day of love, and there is no rule book to what that love may entail. Design your Valentine’s Day with your terms. Make it yours. There is no rulebook.