How The Revelation Of My Love Language Has Changed My Relationship

There is a new love quiz sweeping the nation. And no, it is not like the ones you find in magazines or as links on Facebook. This quiz is built from established knowledge that can be explored further in “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts,” by Gary Chapman. The love language quiz is meant to give insight into what drives your personal desires for love and connection. It can also answer a lot of questions about similarities and differences between you and your partner or the people you pursue. The five love languages are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Taking the quiz to find out your love languages is easy and consists of 30 questions that can be done regardless of if you are in relationship or not.  The answers are really easy and kind of repetitive, but that is meant to ensure accuracy when it comes to “grading” your quiz. In learning and reading information on how to adapt these love languages into my relationship, I have found that things have only changed for the better. For example, my love language grading was distributed as follows :

Quality Time: 9

Words of Affirmation: 9

Acts of Service: 4

Physical Touch: 4

Receiving Gifts: 4

As I anticipated, my most important love languages were Quality Time and Words of Affirmation. To me, that means having his full attention and spending time just the two of us. Each love language is explained and applied to your personal profile. To go deeper into each one, most people purchase the book!

In my relationship, discovering my and my boyfriend's love language explained A LOT about why we argue or why certain things mean less to one person than to the other. Now we have a greater understanding of each others' desires and of what is most important. Simply acknowledging that your partner may prefer quality time over receiving gifts can make it so much easier to know what little things you can change to improve the connection and communication with your person. I was not surprised to find our that our love languages were completely different. I probably could have predicted his results. His results were:

Physical Touch: 9

Receiving Gifts: 8

Acts of Service: 6

Quality Time: 4

Words of Affirmation: 3

He has always loved getting massages and surprise gifts so it made perfect sense. The greatest thing that has improved is our ability to understand how to make each other happier. I can bring home a small gift that reminded me of him and that means more to him than anything else, knowing I was thinking of him when we were apart. Though neither of us have read the book yet, simply knowing what it takes to maintain a happier partnership has made us even more open to discussing the things that don’t matter and insuring that we remain connected through our love languages.


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