Guys claim to be so “simple” and “drama-free.” I beg to differ. From a combination of my own experience and observing the experiences of others, I have come to the conclusion that guys (mind you, not all guys, but most) are not simple. They may claim to be simple and give simple explanations to our complex “WHY??” questions, but when it comes down to actions, they turn into something completely complicated.
Girls, on the other hand, are not as complicated as we are made out to be. I think that guys label us as the complicated ones because they are failing to see that it’s their lack of simplicity that has turned the situation into a jumble of headaches and mental exhaustion.
Guys, if you don’t like us, tell us. Don’t “drop hints” only you know are hints that you aren’t interested. We have no idea if you’re trying to play hard to get or if you’re just shy or nervous or whatever other explanation our minds can come up with. Yes, the “maybe he doesn’t like me” explanation does come up, but we don’t know for sure because you aren’t making it clear. So we continue to try, and then we end up looking like “psychos” – all because you don’t know how to simply say: “Hey, I’m really sorry, but I’m not interested in you.” Ding ding. Okay, we get it now. There is no other explanation we can create in our minds besides you not liking us.
Then there is the ex-boyfriend scenario. Don’t tell your ex-girlfriend how much you miss her and how you’re thinking about asking her out again, and then get caught at the club by your ex-girlfriend with another girl. If you want to be with your ex-girlfriend, then don’t hit on other girls the next night just because you can. And if you really don’t want to be committed again, then don’t tell her you miss her and want to be with her. It could save you a stiletto to the eye and a broken apartment door (True story).
The troubles aren’t just with boy toys. Guy friends are guilty of saying one thing and doing another, too. Why would you say, “Yea, we can hang out,” and then have no intentions of actually trying to hang out? Don’t tell us you can hang out on Monday and then when we call, say you have “homework” to do and maybe you can hang out tomorrow. But then when we text you tomorrow you say you “kind of have plans” with one of your buds. Excuse me? What about our plans, dude? If you had no intentions of setting aside a time to chill and obviously aren’t acting like you care about the friendship, then why didn’t you just say no when asked to hang out? Now the girl looks like the crazy-person and you are being bothered daily, when you could have just been done with it the day you were initially asked.
It seems that some guys are so set on being simple and uncomplicated, that they are–ironically–creating chaos. You didn’t tell the girl you didn’t like her because you didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but all you really did was make her mentally drained from trying to figure out what your “signs” meant and wondering if you really do like her or not, and then she probably ended up crying and feeling like crap anyways once it all blew up and she finally found out that no, you didn’t like her.
Do us girls a favor. Stop trying to be the “nice guy,” the “I-don’t-want-to-hurt-her-feelings guy,” the “simple guy,” or whatever else you think you’re trying to be. You want to be simple? Then be simple. If you feel something, say it. If you don’t want to be our friend, say you don’t want to be our friend. Stick to what you are speaking. If you have no intentions on keeping a promise or following through with whatever nonsense is spewing out of your mouth, then don’t say it. It will not only save us girls from a ton of mental instability, stress, tears, and “I Hate Boys” fro-yo sessions, but it will save you the drama, stress, “psychotic” girls who won’t leave you alone, and keyed car doors.
Girls really can be that simple.