Every time my life gets stressful and overwhelming, I find myself being told to “take care of myself” or “have a self-care day, it’ll make you feel better!” But, if I’m being quite honest, I’m not 100% sure what kind of self-care they’re talking about. Do they mean the surface-level face mask, paint your nails and drink a smoothie? Or do they mean doing the things that make me happy, calm me down and make me feel like myself again?
Not to be a hater (oops), but I’m honestly tired of the media’s presentation of self-care. “Do a face mask! Get your nails done! Shave your legs!” While this may not be everyone’s idea of self-care, it can be for many people. Even though these things seem harmless, let’s get back to the root of all these things—beauty. Self-care is so often presented as not only extremely feminine but focused on doing things to improve your appearance, and therefore, supposedly boost your mood. At its core, self-care is meant to focus on your own health, whether mental or physical. In the past, I would plan my self-care days to the nines, with every possible beauty treatment and whatever the trendy self-care items were at the time. However, afterward, I found myself feeling the same as I did before—like I was still overwhelmed and not taking care of myself. It wasn’t until I got to college that I realized caring for myself meant so many different things, and it was something I could practice every day, not just every once in a while.
I think that it‘s important to recognize that like many things, self-care looks different for everyone. Whether that may be reading a book, watching an early 2000’s romantic comedy or actually doing that face mask, each of these things is valid. However, the point is that it may not always be the same, or look like the media presents it. For me, sometimes self-care is a pint of ice cream, pajamas and watching a rom-com. Other times, it’s laying in bed watching TikTok for hours, with my phone on do not disturb. These are my definitions of self-care, what I need to take care of myself, and honestly, ensure that I don’t lose my mind. Whatever it may be, it’s ok for it to change and important to recognize that, no matter what, you deserve that time and dedication to take care of yourself. Also, as I mentioned, self-care can be practiced every day—putting your phone away for an hour, watching an episode of your favorite show or spending ten minutes meditating—small things that may not be time-consuming, but make you feel good.
While self-care may not always be mud-masks and manicures, sometimes it might be. But just because some days it may look different, that doesn’t mean you deserve it any less—or that it’s not self-care. Take that bubble bath, binge that new series and do whatever it takes to take care of yourself; because you deserve it.