Hey kids, don’t believe everything you see in the movies. Almost every romantic comedy is a false representation of relationships. Every relationship I have ever been is nothing like the relationships in movies. Movies are intended for entertainment purposes and are usually overdramatized. Movies tend to glamorize relationships and portray them in the wrong light. Although most movies portray relationships properly, a good majority of them do not. Listed below are 5 major misconceptions of relationships portrayed in films.
1. Spoiling Your Partner Constantly.
In the movies, you are constantly seeing couples surprise each other with presents and excessive spoiling. In reality, presents are great and all, but there’s no need to spoil your significant other all the time. Birthdays and special occasions are perfect for gift giving, not a weekly or monthly thing. I promise your other half doesn’t need a new pair of shoes or a camera on the weekly. Please ignore what you’ve seen in movies; there is absolutely no need to spoil your significant other 24/7. You see couples in movies all time buying each ridiculous presents just because it’s Tuesday. There are other ways to show your love besides buying each other presents. Shower each other with love instead of overpriced gifts.
2. One Person Pays for Everything.
Have you ever seen a movie where the guy pays for every meal or all of the date activities? I know I have plenty of times. When I was growing up, my perception of dating was based on movies. I always believed the guy should pay for everything. This is totally wrong! It’s okay to let your other half treat you to a nice dinner, but you don’t have to let them pay for everything. I remember the first time my boyfriend asked our waiter for separate checks. I felt confused and didn’t understand why he wasn’t paying for me. In reality, it’s okay to pay separately for meals and other date-related items, like movie tickets, especially if you are a broke college student. I’m not saying it should be a 50/50 thing, but once in a while, you could pay for lunch or for the movie tickets. Paying separately shouldn’t be seen as a bad thing, and it doesn’t mean you aren’t in a real relationship. Paying for yourself is perfectly okay and is completely fine when you are dating.
3. Spending Time Together 24/7.
In every rom-com, you will see couples that spend every waking second together, and I promise you this is not healthy! Taking time for yourself is so important in relationships, and I can’t stress this enough. I remember watching every movie based off of a Nicholas Sparks novel where the couples spend a ridiculous amount of time together without taking a second to breathe. When you are in a relationship, it’s okay to spend a few days apart. Taking space doesn’t mean you aren’t loved or that your partner doesn’t want to spend time with you, they just need to hang out with friends or simply be by themselves. I remember the first time my boyfriend told me he wanted to spend time with his friends instead of me, and I became so defensive. Now, I understand that everybody needs some space once in a while. In Dear John, Savannah and John spent two entire weeks together, in The Last Song, Ronnie and Will spent the summer together, like jeez that is not healthy! Taking a little alone time is so important for your mental health. If you spend every second together, you are going to get on each other’s nerves and want to kill each other.
4. Glamorizing Sex.
Sex in most movies is completely glamorized and is a false representation of sex. Sex in real life is awkward and confusing, but in a beautiful way. Movies portray sex as no big deal, when in reality, sex is a significant aspect of relationships. When I was younger I would watch an eclectic collection of movies that all had sex scenes. My beliefs of intimacy stemmed from these movies and made me think that it was no big deal. Most movies show sex occurring in random places like cars, airplanes, showers and even restaurants, making it seem like it’s normal to be intimate anywhere. From the viewpoint of a young girl, I was confused by the idea of sex and didn’t really know what was real or fake. In a good majority of movies, you’ll see people being intimate in the most random places at the strangest times. In real life, you will most likely not be having sex in one of these nontraditional places. Most of the time, you are not going to have romantic music playing in the background while you are being intimate. In the movies, most people rush into sex without thinking or even talking about it. If you going to have sex with your partner, you should both be on the same page and don’t rush into anything.
5. Dramatic Fighting.
Fights in movies are over dramatic and a false representation of real-life relationship fights. In most films, when couples fight there is an excessive amount of screaming and crying that leads to the couple breaking up or taking an excessive break. In real life, if you are fighting with your significant other, you are most likely going to be yelling, but in a non-dramatic way, without intense music playing in the background. In a real-life relationship, you will most likely communicate with your partner during a fight instead of taking drastic measures and ending the relationship right then and there. In my relationship, if my boyfriend and I are arguing about something, we’ll usually talk through it until we come to a conclusion and makeup. In some movies, you’ll see couples get physical with one another during a fight, which is never okay. There are different ways to work through a fight without resorting to violence. There’s a healthy way to fight instead of through verbal, mental and physical abuse. Instead of verbally attacking each other, try talking in a cohesive way.