Hey guys, do you sometimes think that your girl is speaking a different language than you? Are her “yes’s” really a “no,” and her “no’s” really a “yes?” Well I’m sure you guys know by now that the female species is a bit more complex and we read FAR more into things than men do. Men usually say and mean exactly what’s on their mind, but that’s definitely not the case for women. We’ll say something, but have it mean something TOTALLY different, and want you guys to figure it out. So if your girlfriend is causing you headaches and you have no idea what she really means, I suggest you pay attention.
Here is Her Campus UCF Guide to understanding the “Deadly Terms” of a woman.
“I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship, let’s just be friends….”
What she REALLY means:Women do not ask to be friends with a guy they feel sexually attracted to. “I see you more like a brother” or “I don’t want to ruin our friendship” might be some common answers, and the root of it usually is that they aren’t attracted to you in a sexual way.
“Hey babe, just give me another five minutes….”
What she REALLY means:I need another half hour. I guess it’s kind of equivalent when you’re watching his football games and there’s only 3 minutes left on the clock in the last quarter, but it takes a good half hour for the game to be done between commercials, time-outs, bad calls, you name it. So get comfy guys, you’ll be waiting.
“Does this make me look fat…?”
What she REALLY means:The dreaded question NO man wants to answer. She might be asking because she could be feeling a little down after eating a whole pack of Oreos, but guys, this is your way to turn that frown upside down. DON’T EVER TELL HER SHE LOOKS FAT. Say, “Baby, no matter what you wear, sweats, a dress, or even a trash bag, you always look great.” Divert the negative question into a positive response.
“I’m leaving, but feel free to stay…”
What she REALLY means:You and your man are at a party, you’re getting bored and now you want to leave. Women don’t want to appear controlling so we tell you to stay, when in reality we want you to come back home with us. If you stay, we’ll usually take it as you’d rather be at party than be with us.
“I’m fine, nothing’s wrong…”
What she REALLY means:EVERYTHING IS NOT FINE, ACTUALLY IT’S PROBABLY THE OPPOSITE. This is probably the most overused deadly term said by a woman. Something is obviously wrong, and we want you guys to be concerned and keep asking us until we finally get the courage to come out and say what it is that is bothering us.
“Go ahead….”
What she REALLY means:DO NOT GO AHEAD. This is a DARE to see if you’ll actually do whatever it is, not PERMISSION. Don’t fall for it guys!
“Whatever….”
What she REALLY means:This is a woman’s way of saying F*** YOU!
“I don’t mind paying….”
What she REALLY means:This is a tricky one. She’s trying to look generous, but she probably still wants you to pay. If she truly wants to pay, she’ll just go ahead and do it. But if not, thank her for her generosity, and just pay.
“You don’t have to get me a gift….I don’t want anything”
What she REALLY means:She wants something, anything, so you better get her a gift. It might not be something specific that she’ll be asking for, so that’s why she is saying she doesn’t want anything, but you should ALWAYS get her a gift. NEVER show up empty-handed to her birthday dinner/party especially with her friends around. First off, you’ll be making a jerk out of yourself in front of her friends because they’ll just think you’re a horrible man or a cheapskate. Secondly, you’ll be dead meat in the birthday girls mind, because she’s going to think you not going out and getting flowers, for example, is not worth your time, meaning she’s not worth your time.
“That’s okay….”
What she REALLY means:For example, just say you cheat on your girl, and you’re now realizing your mistake and you’re begging for her forgiveness. She might forgive you and say “that’s okay,” when in reality these words mean that she’s thinking long and hard before deciding HOW and WHEN you WILL pay for your mistake!
In reality, most girls probably won’t be taking these “deadly terms” to the extreme. Yes, I know we’re difficult to read and understand, but now if you run across a few of these expressions, at least you boys will be prepared.