As the weather cools down and the holiday season rolls around, we are now entering into what many like to call the “relationship season.” ‘Tis is the season where many people find it a necessity to select a significant other to cuddle up next to at a bonfire or bring along to a family Christmas party to avoid all of the “Where’s your boyfriend?” spiels from long-distance relatives.
Being freshly in love and what not, the majority of new couples seem to tend to disregard those around them and continue to be in love 24/7. I hate to break it to you, but if you are one of the lucky individuals in one of these newly acclaimed relationships, you tend to be a little, well, uh, annoying to the rest of us.
If you do any or all of the following things, chances are you are most likely “that” annoying couple.
Being overly touchy in public. There is without a doubt nothing more loathsome than a couple that can’t keep their hands off of each other for more than a total of .5 seconds. There are a select few circumstances where extreme PDA is acceptable. Romantic stroll under the Eiffel Tower? Ok, fine. Spoon-feeding each other on the same side of the booth while at a sports bar? Absolutely not. Those sorts of situations are completely nauseating for anyone else in the general vicinity.
Going MIA from the rest of the world. When you meet someone that you love spending time with, it can be easy to hang out with them and only them. But really, where’s the fun in that? Locking yourself in your bedroom can get extremely boring, and I’m sure your friends don’t appreciate you dropping off the face of the earth. Making separate plans will only make your time together that much more enjoyable. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, right?
Becoming a packaged deal. Turning into a packaged deal can be almost, if not equally, as annoying as going MIA completely. Being able to go out in groups and hang out with your friends and man simultaneously is awesome. However, girls shopping day with lover boy trailing behind carrying the shopping bags and trying to act like he knows what you’re gossiping about is not a fun scenario for anyone involved.
Participating in excessive Facebook PDA. Alright, we get it. You have a boyfriend and you guys are madly in love. Nothing makes your Facebook friends cringe more than airing your dirty, coupley laundry on your Facebook page. Do you mobile upload pic stitches of four kissey pictures at the beach, write cutesy love notes on each others’ walls, or post statuses about how much you adore one another? If so, please stop. And in all honestly, everyone else could care less that it is your three-month anniversary with your baby boo.
Using obnoxious pet names excessively and/or in public. Obnoxious pet names include, but are not limited to, “pookie bear,” “love muffin,” “smoochie poo,” “lovey boo” -pretty much anything along the poo or boo line. Unless they are being used sarcastically, these all sound like extreme word vomit to me. Witnessing a couple being all goo-goo ga-ga about each other causes everyone else around them to run for the hills. Ditch the pet names and try going for something a little more subtle like “babe.” If you’re feeling a bit more daring, try actually using their real name.
If you successfully read through this post and none of these scenarios rang any bells, congratulations! You are probably not in a relationship that is getting on the nerves of everyone around you. If while reading this you had an “uh oh…” moment, there is a strong possibility you are “that” annoying couple.