Leaving high school meant splitting apart from my high school friends, but with that came a lot of daydreams of all of the memories I’d make with new friends. I imagined parties, going to concerts and finally enjoying Disney as a young adult with new people. Instead, I was greeted with heartbreaks, a few close friends, and a lot of new experiences in navigating a dating life, something I had never seen coming. My journey from 18-year-old me to now 22-year-old me has proven that relationships in different stages of your life all play a different role in how our perceptions and emotions of relationships form. However, through it all, I’ve learned that there are three things that will never change when it comes to finding a “Prince Charming.”
- Every relationship is a blessing
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No matter who are you with, every relationship is truly a blessing. Although none have gone my way so far, even through the tears I’ve been able to find the beauty in each one. I’ve realized over time that lessons can be learned even in your dating life, whether it’s about you as an individual or your personal preferences of what you want in a partner. Each relationship reveals something you never knew about yourself. I came into the dating world thinking I wanted the standard “someone who is kind and caring,” and while all of this is still true, I never dug deeper into what I truly wanted. Every relationship thus far has culminated into realizing that I wanted a partner that would stand up for me, be my hype-man, and empathize with how I felt, even when it felt like it was impossible to do so.
- You may have to compromise and sacrifice
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Compromise seems like an easy thing to understand — you meet someone in the middle and find a solution that works for both of you. Although it’s a simple concept, I’ve found it harder to grasp when it comes to a relationship, and it’s only gotten harder the older I get. So-called adult relationships in your early 20s do not only require navigating the basic relationship necessities, but also the topics that deal with career direction, location preferences and dealing with money — basically all of the big girl things! With these things comes figuring out how to compromise on topics that are so essential to our own individuality. But, sometimes in relationships, it comes to a point where the only realistic options are to compromise, sacrifice or let go of a relationship. It’s a hard lesson to digest, but the most eye-opening one to learn.
- Never settle
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I’ve heard the saying “never settle” before, but let’s be honest: it never sunk in until it actually sunk in. It took me a long time to have enough confidence in myself to be okay with the unknown. Most of us are scared of being alone; I know I was, and I still am. Sometimes, as cheesy as it sounds, it takes healing and self-love to realize that you’re worth more than what you may want to settle for. This lesson is the most important lesson I’ve learned to this day. The beauty of the phrase “never settle” is that it doesn’t just apply when you’re in a relationship, but it also applies when you’re the one being broken up with. Letting go and realizing that you don’t have to settle lets you open up new doors, new opportunities, and most importantly, new relationships.
As this year closes, I realize there’s still a long way to go in terms of love and relationships for me. After all, I’m only 22! I have no doubt that I’ll learn many more lessons along the way, and I’m excited to do so. For now, I’m happy with myself. I’m happy learning to love who I am and working to develop myself into the woman I know I can be. For now, I’m not looking for my “Prince Charming.” I’m just looking for myself.