College roommates are interesting, aren’t they? For better or worse, cohabitating with anyone for a year, a semester, or even just a few weeks can have a major impact on your life. I was talking with my friends the other day, and we were counting out how many roommates we’ve each had since high school graduation. You know whats crazy? I’ve lived with 28 roommates since graduating from high school! That’s crazy! As you can imagine, I have quite a few stories (good, bad, and messy). From these girls, I was able to compile the 10 types of roommates you’ll have in college.
The High Maintenance One
You ask her if she’s ready to go out, and she responds, “I need a few more minutes. My hair feathers need some adjusting.” If you share a bathroom, The High Maintenance One is a nightmare. Not only do her showers last for an hour, she’ll spend the entire morning sitting on the vanity just staring at her eyebrows. She probably can’t help out with chores, because she just painted her nails (again). She talks a lot, and has plenty of stories about her very dramatic life. One look at her Twitter, and you’ll see the hashtag #princessproblems quite a few times.
The Loud One
It’s like someone turned the volume all the way up on this girl, then lost the remote. You know when she’s home, even when she is in a different room. The Loud One knows every lyric to Taylor Swift’s 1989, and treats the apartment like her own private stage. She likes to use speakerphone. The Loud One is often oblivious to her tendencies to slam doors, bang pots and pans, and stomp loudly through the room. Even if you don’t live with one of these girls, you know when there’s a Loud One in your building. Living on the floor below a Loud One is like living beneath an elephant.
The One Who Became Your Best Friend
So you’ve never met this girl before, and you’re a little concerned. When you moved in and started decorating your room, her Comp Poms trophies really didn’t look right next to your Slytherin poster. After a few awkward first conversations, you start finding out that you do in fact have things in common. Sure, in high school she was the prom queen and you ate lunch alone in your AP Physics classroom, but you’re both vegetarians and you both played Logical Journey of the Zoombinis on Windows 95. Maybe you weren’t supposed to be best friends, but after just a few weeks, you’re inseparable. Your styles start blending as you borrow each other’s clothes, your communal Disney DVD collection grows, and you decide to spend all your money on matching hair bows. People might call you a clique, but a clique has to consist of three or more people. You’re just BFFs, and you’re lucky to have met The One Who Became Your Best Friend.
The One Who Became Your Worst Enemy
You were so excited to live with this girl. She’s your sorority sister, your pal from class, or the cool girl you met through a club on campus. Unfortunately, after about a week of living together in what seemed like a match made in roommate heaven, she started to drive you crazy. You can’t put your finger on why at first, but as the months roll on, the little things start piling up, and you feel like you’re about to explode. Before you lived together, you loved how “crafty” she was. Now, you are sick of the messy art studio that your living room has become. Her famous cupcakes that you couldn’t get enough of? They’ve been sitting on the kitchen counter for two months (and they’re pretty moldy). You never noticed how she grunts when angry, until now. She’s the worst, and you’re pretty excited that you’ll never have to live with her again.
The Neat Freak
When a fork is put in the wrong drawer, or a towel is left on the floor, The Neat Freak will freak out. She’s a pretty nice girl, but she’ll turn into a fire-breathing dragon if you spill makeup on the bathroom counter. You’ve probably heard a passive-aggressive “wow, the kitchen is really dirty” come from her mouth a few times, but have patience. She’s probably having a panic attack because you didn’t wash your dishes again.
If your roommate is a slob, you know it. One plate in the sink won’t hurt anyone, but when The Slob’s two-week old brownie batter covered mixing bowl is drawing bugs to the kitchen, it is everybody’s problem. The Slob lives in squalor, much to the dismay of her roommates, who constantly deal with her messes, spills, and smells. You haven’t seen the floor of her room in weeks, because it is covered with piles of who knows what. You know your favorite mug is somewhere under her bed (probably with oatmeal remnants glued to it), but you won’t go looking for it in fear of the creatures that may be lurking in her room.
The One Who Parties Too Much
You’ve probably (literally) saved her life multiple times since you moved in together. She comes home at 3 a.m. after going to the club on a Tuesday, and reeks of sweat and alcohol… and maybe some other party smells. If you live with The One Who Parties Too Much, you know who you are.
The One Who Doesn’t Party
“I don’t drink, but I don’t mind if you do,” says The One Who Doesn’t Party, as she glares at your glass of Moscato as if it is the devil himself is swimming around in it. We’re all entitled to our own personal choices, which is something she’ll remind you in a condescending tone approximately once per week. Don’t let The One Who Doesn’t Party make you feel too guilty though, she’s the one missing out on the fun.
Does The Sloth even take classes? You’ve never seen her get out of bed. Her life is an endless stream of YouTube playlists, Twitter chats, and online games. She might be a hidden genius, but you can’t tell. Her preferred method of communication is a caveman style grunt, and you really haven’t ever seen her shower (or brush her teeth… or hair… or anything). You’ve never seen a human move quite as slowly as The Sloth.
Somehow between juggling seven classes, two jobs, and an internship, The Overachiever is the captain of the lacrosse team, a columnist for the school paper, a competitive dancer, and is developing the cure for cancer. She feels the pressure of post-graduation life setting in, and is doing everything she can to further her career right now. You probably won’t see her too often, but when you do, she is a reminder of what you miss out on by spending hours watching Netflix. The Overachiever gets exactly eight hours of sleep, works out for an hour each day, and is rarely seen without her iPhone in hand. She can be pretty scary, but you also know that being nice to her could get you a job one day.
Living with other people involves making a lot of compromises in order to make the situation as harmonious as possible, and knowing what kind of roommate you are is the first step in finding balance. I know that I’m a monstrous Overachiever/ Neat Freak. It’s cool. I just have to be very patient when living with Slobs and Sloths. No matter who you are, or who your roommates are, patience is the key to roommate happiness (or at least tolerance).