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Why I Love My Female Friendships

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The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UCD chapter.

Dolly Anderton said it herself, “Nearly everything I know about love, I have learnt from my long-term friendships with women,” in her book Everything I Know About Love. I deeply resonate with this quote because my female friendships are one of my most wholesome connections and beautiful things I get to experience in this complicated thing we call life. From sharing lip gloss to sharing our past traumas, my girls have stuck with me through thick and thin. Many times, we tend to yearn or look for love. We never realize that through childhood, girlhood, teenagehood, and adulthood, our best friends have always been there supporting us through every step of the way and have shown us judgment free love. To me, that is one of the purest forms of love. We stay up late talking about falling in love, without realizing that we already know love because we learn it from each other. 

As a student in college, my female friendships are what have allowed me to get through university so far, and I know that they will continue to. When I sit and reflect on my college friends, I can’t help but tear up at the fact of how much I will miss the time I get with them. The random nights of just hanging out in one of our rooms and spending time together when we each have so much to do. Living with them or seeing them every single day, and facetime them if you don’t see them every day. I have had the privilege to learn about their cultures and families, and the details about them. I do certain things the way they taught me. Even though I love and cherish my college girlfriends, I have learned that distance can never break a connection with a best friend. From finding a time in between time differences to facetime even for 10 minutes, to sending a “I miss you” text in the middle of the night, to counting down hundreds of days to see her again. Despite it all, the connection remains. And after all that time, you still pick up right where you left off.

The best kinds of friendships are those that don’t have any jealousy, comparison, or competition. Instead, they’re rooted from pure love, support, and smiles. The ones that make you feel at home in the easiest form, while you are thousands of miles away from home. I got lucky enough to find my bridesmaids before my husband. Pour into your friendships and make sure that they are a priority, because they are the ones who have stuck through thick and thin with you, and will continue to do so. Put your heart and soul into them, because a female friendship full of support goes a really long way. But with any relationship, make sure that effort and love is being reciprocated! 

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Here is a list of some of my favorite aspects of having the best female friendships: 

  • Cooking or getting food together 
  • Get all dressed up to go to a new restaurant. And then saying “Can we order two things and then split them?”
  • Karaoke nights and random dance parties on a weekday when everyone needs it
  • Having them sit in your room while you clean it or do something because you like their presence 
  • Sunsets with wholesome music
  • Doing each other’s hair and makeup and watching each other get ready for dates
  • Girl’s night!!!!
  • “Text me when you get home.” “Stay on call while you walk home.”
  • “I know you like this, so I got it for you.”
  • “Tell me about your day.”
  • Getting ready together while blasting girly music 
  • Debriefing the morning after a night out in pjs 
  • “Do I look good in this photo?” “Yes. If you don’t post it, I will.”
  • “I miss you so much, and I can’t wait to see you.” (I saw you an hour ago)
  • Cuddles (even with your friends that don’t like physical touch)
  • “It’s okay, I will hear you talk about it again. Yes, I will listen. Yes, I understand.” 
  • “No, you’re not dumb for feeling this way.” (Giving reassurance) 
  • “Yes, I can cook for you.”
  • “I have to do work, but yes I will stay up longer so that I can spend time with you”
  • “Yes I have class, but we can get lunch together before or after.” 
  • “Yes, you can drink my coffee. Yes, you can have my food.”
  • “Yes, Facetime me or call me.” 
  • Studying together. Going to the gym together. Walking to class together. Doing anything, but doing it together. 
  • “Yes, you can steal clothes from my closet.” 
  • “Please sleep over.” 

I hope that this article reminds you to cherish and give love to your friendships. And if you haven’t had the chance to experience a love of this kind, be patient. It takes time to find the people that stick and make friendships feel easy, but once you do, cherish them like you would any relationship.

Hi everyone! My name is Raaina Gulati. I am an international student from Costa Rica who is double majoring in psychology and economics, with a tech management minor. I love playing sports, trying new things, spending time with my family and friends, and watching sunsets!