Everyone wants to feel safe, respected, and validated, but pronoun misuse disregards these wants. Honestly, this problem is way too common. How many times have I heard “Oh, I did not know” or “Well they looked like…” or several other types of variations. Many people who misuse pronouns blame it on lack of knowledge or it being an accident, but it all comes down to one fact. They assumed. They judged someone by what they were wearing, how they were acting, their physical features, and based their conclusion on stereotypes held for certain appearances. It is an easy issue to avoid, and, in my opinion, the public should be educated more.
Assuming pronouns is hurtful. It often comes across as ignorance and is not in support of the LGBTQIA community. Assumptions are often formed through outdated ideas involving the different sexes that make up our society. They group individuals together instead of identifying the things that make us unique and ourselves. Imagine being constantly identified as something you are not. It would be exhausting trying to continuously correct people. To lessen the harmful impact that gender and sexuality stereotyping can cause, we can all be more mindful of what we say and how we act towards each other.
Educating yourself, adjusting your behavior, and staying mindful are simple ways to be an ally to the LGBTQIA community. Using gender-inclusive language is a big way to do this. Instead of using words that divide individuals into male or female categories, try using gender-neutral words. For example, instead of saying husband or wife, switch to the term spouse. It is very common to start using gender-neutral pronouns and case endings. Instead of Latina or Latino, we can use Latinx to stray from gender forward language.
Make the decision to be an ally! Listen to those around you, practice not assuming, and learn from your mistakes. Happy *almost* Pride Month!