Whether it was from the boy that has been sitting next to you in your math class for the whole quarter or a random girl that you met at a party and only sent one text to, we have all experienced some form of rejection. When somebody that you’ve been eyeballing tells you that they “think of you like a sibling”, your heart drops. Whether they have ignored that well-thought-out text message that took all of your courage to send or straight up just say that they are not interested in you, it is easy to become discouraged. So, how is somebody supposed to take rejection with grace and move on swiftly and easily? There are a few things that you can keep in mind in order to make dealing with your case of rejection a little bit more bearable.
Image source: Burak Kostak
Remember, it’s not you, it’s them.
In most cases of rejection, one often feels that it’s their fault that the other person doesn’t like them or they feel that they have done something wrong. Oftentimes, this is not actually the case. The person that has rejected you may have many reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with you. It could be that they have already committed to someone else (and I’m sure you don’t want to be a homewrecker), that they are busy focusing on other things like work or school, or that they are simply just not ready to be in a relationship… with anyone. Do not let the rejection make you believe that there is something wrong with you or that you have done something to drive the other person away because most of the time, this is not the case.
There are plenty of fish in the sea.
This one may seem cliche, but it is true. I know that right now it may seem like this person is the perfect person for you and that you will never find someone quite like them, but, trust me, you are going to find someone that will be just as compatible, if not more compatible, someday soon. We often focus on trying to find someone that is exactly like the person that rejected us, and forget that there was obviously something that didn’t work out. Instead of looking for someone who reminds you of the person who rejected you, you should be looking for someone who will have the time and energy to respond to that text message that you thoroughly thought over and wrote with the help of your friends.
It is better to be rejected sooner than later.
Think about it. I’m sure you would rather know immediately if you were not compatible with somebody than wait for them to lead you on and then let you down later in your relationship. Rejection is very hard to deal with, but you will get over it quicker if the person rejects you early. Just think about it as if you are being given more time to get over it and move on.
Something better is going to come around.
Good things come to those who wait. You may have to live through one or one hundred rejections before finding your person, but at the end of the day, all of the rejections and waiting will be worth it. You are going to find your somebody someday, and all of the people that come before that are going to be lessons that you are going to learn and grow from.
Learn from the rejection and allow yourself to grow.
As I have mentioned, every person that comes into your life can serve as a lesson learned. Instead of dwelling on the sadness of the rejection and beating yourself up about the whole situation, you can choose to learn from it instead. Because of rejection, you now know what types of people and situations to avoid when trying to pursue a relationship. In the future, look for people that do not demonstrate the same red flags as the people from before and learn to read the signs of a relationship that is not going very well.
Rejection is never going to be easy to deal with for anyone, but there are things that you can remind yourself of in order to keep yourself from going crazy. Remember not to beat yourself up over the rejection or to blame yourself because it isn’t your fault. You deserve love just as much as anyone else and the wait for the right person will be worth it. Learning from previous experiences will allow you to grow and to help you realize what you truly deserve. Rejection is hard, but you are strong enough to conquer it.
Image source: Pixabay