Confession: I’m not perfect. As a patented perfectionist, that is inherently the problem. For as long as I can remember, everything I did needed to be the best possible, and if I felt it wasn’t, I was devastated. I would spend hours painstakingly crafting overly-detailed notes, overworking myself to the point where I was sacrificing other aspects of my life to keep up this unattainable goal of perfection. And that’s what I’ve realized: ultimate perfection is impossible to achieve all the time, the focus should be on making something that you can be proud of, something that is perfect for YOU.
I’ve discovered one of the side effects of being a perfectionist is the worst habit possible: procrastination. Feeling that if you can’t make something perfect at the moment, then you should just wait until you can. Then, your fear that it won’t be perfect stops you from starting until the last minute, thus leaving you stressed and dealing with self-inflicted time constraints that give you less margin for revision.
How have I overcome my nasty procrastination habits? Short answer: I haven’t, not completely. But, I have learned to manage it by breaking down my work into smaller chunks. Taking my assignments day-by-day, and planning ahead to give myself the appropriate amount of time needed to be proud of what I submit, without allowing me too much time to obsess over it.
The second biggest side effect of perfectionism I’ve noticed is my overwhelming amount of self-criticism, yet somehow remaining sensitive to criticism from others. It’s a weird paradox, but one that I’ve learned to balance by understanding the difference between constructive criticism and unnecessary nitpicking (I’m guilty of inflicting the latter on myself). I’ve learned that being open to the opinions of others can only enhance your work or add to your perspective on life. Instead of being too scared to ask for others’ opinions, afraid of harshness or critiques on what you’ve tried so hard to make perfect, think about it as an opportunity to see things from another point of view, to strengthen yourself and what you’ve done through being open-minded and understanding of all perspectives.
As a patented perfectionist, I take criticism very seriously, but I’ve learned to see it as an experience for growth, rather than be afraid of it. For, how can we get better, how can we improve ourselves, if we only have one set of eyes to see the world through? Criticism is a window into how others view the world, and how their experience can strengthen your own perspective/influence your work. Learning how to take constructive criticism is not a punishment, it’s a gift.
Growth comes to those who are open-minded and understanding, not obstinate and afraid of change. Be open, and understand that perfection, though definitely something to strive for, has no concrete definition. Perfection is different based on circumstance, and perhaps perfect for you on one day is different than on another, and that is completely valid. Be proud of who you are, and be open to shifting your perspective. Be a perfectionist who understands their faults and only grows from them. Be kind to yourself. Allow criticism to fuel you, to novitiate you to evolve and thrive. Be an imperfect perfectionist, and be proud of it.