Upon entering college, I learned something that has proved to be extremely valuable, even three years later as I conclude my junior year. During my freshman year at UC Davis, I found myself overwhelmed with opportunities to meet new people as well as stressing about meeting the wrong people and losing contact with my friends from home. Being on the quarter system, I already felt myself slipping away from my friends as they had all been in school for a month in the semester system, were able to adjust, and found their new friends. I was worried that I would pick the wrong event to go to or the wrong club to join and end up with friends I didn’t like and then that would be it. However, I soon realized that stress was unnecessary and I would end up with the people I was meant to be with. Not only that, but I also learned that losing friends is okay. It’s meant to happen. Not everyone is supposed to be in your life forever — some people are just there to share a few experiences before you both go your own ways.
For a long time, I have stressed about my social life and having enough friends; I still do. I especially used to stress about losing friends, whether it be from a fight or simply losing touch. I would constantly look back on those friendships and feel sad, even the ones from elementary school with people I haven’t even seen for more than ten years.
So, in my freshman year of college, I rushed to make the first friends I could make, with a fear of having none. While some of those friendships were better than others, by now I don’t talk to many of the people I was spending so much time with that year. I found myself drifting away from all these people at different times in my life — some only a few months after meeting them, and some a year or two later. Going home when COVID first hit in the spring quarter of my freshman year definitely resulted in me losing a solid number of the friendships I had just begun to create, and it left me overthinking and reflecting a lot. At first, I found myself thinking I wasn’t good enough for them to keep in contact with and that’s why it was so hard. But, after a lot of reflecting, I found myself concluding that it was just what was meant to happen.
No matter how long or short any of those friendships were, they were right being just the length they were. I learned what I needed to learn, good or bad, and would use those experiences to grow as a person and shape my future. I found myself being able to connect this to the past friendships I had so much trouble letting go of, and now even use it in my present day. I have found that even though it still hurts a lot to lose a friend, this outlook has helped me to come to terms with it. It has helped me to feel grateful for the people that have been in my life, both temporary and permanent, and appreciate any and all impact they have left on my life.