1. Oh my gosh, this class is insane. Maybe I should go to office hours before finals?
2. But my professor is so intimidating…
3. Maybe my professor is human in person. I can ask how to study for our final!
4. Squeezed an appointment in between classes. Now I’m really on top of life.
5. Class just got out, runs to office hours.
6. Halfway there, realize the chance of having an awkward encounter with the professor.
7. Decide it would be worse to back out… convince yourself you’re on your way to a great professor hang out time.
8. Oh crap. The door’s shut… do I knock? Do I just stand here?
9. Gah!! There’s another student in there!
10. Act natural while waiting.
11. Finally, my turn! Wait… small talk? I forgot about small talk!
12. So nervous you blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.
13. You try not to be unnerved by the professor’s unreadable, staring eyes.
14. Ask professor weird personal questions in a flustered attempt to take the attention off yourself.
15. Oh, right, the reason I came here.
16. Well, I was hoping you would engage me in an exciting intellectual conversation involving your brilliant ideas.
17. And perhaps enlighten me on how to study for this obscure final
18. and really, really spell things out for me.
19. Professor essentially says:
20. You feel professor is implying you haven’t been taking class seriously enough.
21. Well…
22. Things progress steadily downhill,
23. especially since you feel the need to salvage your reputation.
24. Ask professor a question about lecture that randomly pops into your head to appear interested in higher education.
25. Instead of answering your question, the professor asks you what you think it means.
26. You wish you could be honest
27. but you want to impress your professor after your first blunder. You go for it.
28. Your words essentially sound like this:
29. Finally, your brain shows up and for once is very insightful:
30. You decide to follow this advice: “Thanks so much for your help, got to run to my next class!”