Ah, yes, let’s talk about failed relationships… Well, first off I don’t have many friends to begin with but I can assure you, there’s a reason for that. My circle is so small simply due to the fact that people are plain snakes. Sorry to say, but it’s the truth and I’m just speaking facts! When I was a kid in elementary school, I had so many friends to talk and hang out with. Like any other kid, we all liked to play outside after school and even have playdates. It was the age of innocence. As I got older, I was able to build friendships through common interests, classes, different cultural backgrounds, etc. However, even to this day, I somehow end up getting stabbed in the back or realizing that the so-called “friend” I had, was never really a friend in the first place. And that’s okay, you know, it’s part of life. Not to mention, it is SO hard to find true girl friends sometimes. Seriously. I would have to say my first year of college was the absolute worst time in my teenage life when it came to friendships.
Being a fourth-year as I type this article, I have to say that I am truly grateful to be where I am today and fully accept how small my circle is. I wouldn’t want it to be any other way, and lastly, I would like to say thank you to the past friendships I had. They really taught me a lot about other people but most importantly, myself. That being said, whoever is reading this, whoever can relate, I want you to know that you are not alone, which is why I am here to list some beneficial things of failed friendships.
- The Removal of Toxic People
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Having a fake friend is more detrimental than it seems. Ever had a friend jealous of you or feel like there’s always a competition on who’s better? That negative energy is nothing but harmful towards self-growth. You can’t control how others are going to act, but you can always choose whether or not you want to associate with those people. I chose to remove myself from negative people and situations that would hurt me. Not only did I disassociate from toxic friends, but I was able to thrive better without them. I felt happy, relieved, and free. When you let go of someone so toxic, it literally feels like a weight has lifted off your shoulders.
- You Can Do Whatever You Want Without Getting Held Back
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I know, it sounds really dramatic but I’ve experienced this. I’ve had friends who dictate where we should go, do, or even wear. It’s rare to find controlling friends but it is possible. I always thought it was polite to do what others wanted. As I grew up, I realized that I needed to put myself first and never let anyone take advantage of me. These fake, controlling friends helped me realize that I could never let anyone treat me that way. It ended up making me love myself more.
- Appreciate the Real Friends You Actually Have
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I used to want fifty friends instead of five. I always felt that it was more fun but in reality, it was drama 24/7. Having a large group of friends brought in so much gossip and backstabbers which is why I am so grateful for the two real friends that I have in my life. These two friends that I have are very supportive, loyal, and caring. It is so much better to have a smaller circle of genuine people as opposed to having a large group of friends who are fake and will be less likely to care about you. Always appreciate the people in your life.
I value friendships wholeheartedly and can truthfully admit that the failed friendships are life lessons to make you grow as an individual. Friends can break your heart too, which sucks, but in the long run you learn to put yourself first and never settle for less. More friends will come which takes patience but work on yourself and allow your failed friendships to be a growing opportunity!