Spice Up Your Sex Life: Vibrators and Couples

Vibrators don’t have to be intimidating. They are fun and can create a great sexual experience for all those involved. I understand that it may be difficult to talk to a partner about wanting to use a sex toy, but it does not have to be!


When beginning a sexual relationship with someone, I can be very candid about sex, especially my masturbation habits. For the most part, the partners I have had are willing to use it when we are being intimate.


In all my time incorporating sex toys into my sex life, I’ve only had one negative reaction. My partner and I had already talked about our masturbation habits and I had told him about my vibrator. While we were having sex, I brought out my Magic Wand and I swear, I saw his eyes widen with fear. When I put it to my clitoris, he said it hurt him, so I quickly put it away. In retrospect, I think he was intimidated by it.


(Image via Allure)


You may come across or have a partner that feels as if you wanting a vibrator is a reflection of their sexual ability.  However, reassure them that this is not the case. Many people, especially women, need a little extra help in order to orgasm. One way you can avoid them feeling this way  is by asking your partner to help you pick out a vibrator, so they’re part of the process


Using a vibrator doesn’t mean you’re defective, most women simply have an easier time orgasming with a vibrator. That’s ok. Women don’t usually orgasm the way pornstars do and you should never be made to feel less than for not being able to. If your partner makes you feel bad, then it may be a time to reassess your relationship.  


(image via bestproducts.com)


If you already have a toy, it's ok to introduce it to your partner. Once you have a vibrator, there are many ways to incorporate them into your sex life. They can hold you while you use it on yourself, they can use it on you, or they can watch you and you can put on a show! Or they can use a dildo on you while performing oral sex. You can even use it on them!  If your partner has a penis and they are open to the idea, the area between the testicles and the anus is particularly sensitive.


It might be scary to approach the subject, but know that the sex toy business is a multi-billion dollar industry. A lot of people have vibrators or other sex toys, and just because you don’t see it in media often, it doesn't mean they're not out there, helping women orgasm. If you have a partner or someone lined up for a hookup, bring it up. Your clitoris will thank you.