Soulmates

It took me a long time to figure it out, but your soulmate isn’t always someone you romantically love. 

Sometimes, it is. Sometimes your soulmate is someone you cuddle up with after long days and you find your comfort in the areas of their body where you fit perfectly –  between their arms, legs, intertwined, fingers draped on their chest. Sometimes your soulmate is found when you share that perfect first kiss under the stars on the lawn of your campus at 2am. Sometimes your soulmate is someone you look lovingly at during a long drive home that goes early into the morning, just noticing them and reveling in the peace their presence around you brings. But for me, at least, a soulmate is someone who I never would expect. 

She was a friend of a friend who needed a ride home from the airport. I had a gap in between my classes and my job that day. I’d seen her around before but never expected to like her because of her ‘resting bitch face’ and intimidating presence. But on that drive back from LAX in bumper to bumper traffic, I connected with her. I shared similar life stories, paths just parallel to each other but never connecting until this moment. Driving through Starbucks and ordering opposite drinks, but I appreciated how her differences complimented me. 

She is someone who I’d come to know as a best friend. The person who I’d confide in about awful first dates,  who would pick me up from a party when I was having an awful time, or make me dinner in her kitchen until I felt better. Someone who would keep my secrets and never make me feel ashamed, embarrassed, or judged. Someone I would turn to first as soon as something exciting happens in my life, eager to share excitements and successes with, because she knows the highs and lows that no one else does. Someone who doesn’t know who I was before I met her, but who sees me as I am now and is by my side for whoever I  want to be. 

And yes, of course, one day I dream of finding that perfect, special someone who fills all the pieces of myself that can only be met with a wedding ring. But more than that, I want her to know that special person, and love them just as much as I do. I’ve realized that a life without a great romance would be sad; but, nothing would be more tragic than finding that great love and not having her by my side to celebrate it with me and give the champagne toast at my wedding. 

Because more than anything, I find that time and time again my heart will deceive me. Boys change their minds. They break me and leave me in the dust. But the person who I lay next to in bed watching our favorite sitcoms and laughing until tears come out over just about anything is the person whom my soul matches with more than anything.  I never want to take friendship soulmates for granted. The twin flames that are met by fate, and carried on by the mutual understanding that nothing comes close to the power of sisterhood, some tough love, and a supreme nacho plate from BJ’s. 

The next time I start to delude myself into thinking that I’ll never find my great romantic love, the Derek to my Meredith, the Nick to my Jess, I’ll always remember Kayli, and the incredible impact she continues to have on my life and the special place that she’ll hold in my heart forever (especially over any dumb boy).

• best friends
• friendship