Ask Annie: Feeling Lonely, Trust Issues, and Confused

Dear Lonely Cat Lady,

You’re definitely not alone. Many of us feel we are too tired to try to socialize with people when we simply don’t have the time or energy. You’re not becoming a hermit or a cat lady; it’s something called “the adult years”. In our teen years we were anxiously waiting to be 18 then when 18 hit; we wanted to be 21. As an adult having a social life
becomes more complicated and difficult to manage. Graduation is coming close for you so I suggest making the most of time you have left as a student. College is one of the most wonderful experiences and it doesn’t matter if your first 3 years were full of “drama” and “not so healthy behavior”, tomorrow is a new beginning and with that Carpe Diem, in other words, SEIZE THE DAY. Make the most of your day and week. Start off your days with maybe going on a walk or jog to distress the mind, and invite a friend, that way you can socialize and exercise at the same time. Yes the weekends are for fun, but don’t forget your studies. Plan your weekends according to your studies. That is maybe leave Friday night to go out, and Saturday and Sunday to study. Not too much partying but enough to capitalize on your free time. Invite co-workers or friends for a girls night, or go to a hole-in-the-wall bar/coffee shop and strike up a conversation with a cutie. Don’t forget Lonely Cat Lady just because you have a strenuous life doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. Remember to enjoy college while you still can!

How can I make my parents trust me more when I go out. Is this a girl thang? 
-Grown but Not Grown Enoguh

Dear Grown but Not Grown Enough,

Yes, blatantly it’s a girl thang. Parents are always over protective of their daughters because they are afraid of dangers like rape and pregnancy. The issue with trusting a daughter revolves around
communication and responsibility. Do you have good grades? Are you responsible? Do you cause

trouble? If you answered yes, yes, and no in that order then you’re in luck. Parents like to see that their daughter is a strong woman with a good head on her shoulders. If you can prove to your parents you have good grades, you’re responsible, and stay out of trouble then you can surely explain to your parents how they deserve to trust you when you go out. Talk to your parents and set up a plan. Tell them you will call them when you arrive to your location, and they can call you every 1 to 2 hours to check up on you. Make sure they give you a curfew, and you arrive back on time, not late of course. Gradually, your parents will call you less every hour eventually only calling you only once throughout the evening. Keep this regime of responsibility when going out and I guarantee your parents will have full trust and won’t have to worry about their little girl being kidnapped or pregnant.

I don’t know where i’m going with my life and I feel so lost.

Dear Anonymous,

You’re definitely not alone. We all feel like that sometimes, like we are stuck and aren’t going nowhere with our lives, this my friend, is called a rut. When you’re stuck in rut then see it as a positive thing. Once you’re down the only way is up. Take these precautions when you feel lost. First evaluate yourself. Are you happy? Are you making people happy? Do you love yourself and your friends and family? If yes to all these then you’re on the right track to getting out of the rut. Look at yourself in the mirror and say 10 nice things about yourself. Start off with looks then chop it down to your personality. Boosting your ego is sometimes a good feeling, but too much can be obnoxious. Now, ask your friends and family what they like about you. Focus on the positive only, nothing negative about yourself. Next, try going back to things that made you happy, such as reading, your favorite cartoon, or your favorite hobby. Once you are content, next is looking into your future. The future is ambiguous, it can change with any little step, but the important part of the future is that you will be happy with your life. This is where help comes in, seek a guidance counselor, tell them what you want in life and don’t want in life. Get down to pros and cons and ask how you can be productive and be happy. Keep in mind that no one can make you happy, only you can. Guidance counselors are there to help you every step of the way. So, it’s okay if you’re lost, you just need a little push and some guidance and you’re off to become the world’s first Supreme Court Judge by night and Super Model by day. You may never know. Until next time keep your head up.