How has “enough” not been enough when everyone is seemingly doing everything? Being a student of UC Berkeley is a unique experience as it brings with it a certain amount of guilt. This is the guilt of spending the day relaxing by watching my favorite TV shows after an exhausting day of classes but suddenly remembering how much more I could be doing. When I realize that I could be studying for an upcoming exam, preparing for the job I’m interviewing for, and even attending yet another club meeting instead of enjoying myself.
At Berkeley, being ambitious is not an encouragement, but rather a requirement. We’re constantly being bombarded by people with a perfect life. The classmate who’s already interviewing for a summer internship, the friend that got his first leadership role in some organization, and that guy you met at some party who is double majoring and working a part-time job. While they seem to be doing perfectly fine, you’re struggling to keep up with your assignments for that week. And yet, despite everything you’ve done to get to this point, you feel that it hasn’t been enough.
The berkeley bubble of overachievement
Gaining admission into Berkeley is, in itself, quite an achievement. However, after gaining entry into the institution, one starts feeling like the very notion of success changes immediately. While, in high school, success might mean having great grades, engaging in extracurricular activities, and having a decent résumé, all of the same becomes the minimal expectation at Berkeley.
It’s not enough anymore to get good grades. One needs to not only do this but do it while working on an internship, getting involved with student groups, meeting industry people, and keeping up with social life.
The pressure is not necessarily coming from one’s professors or even parents. It usually comes from the fact that one exists in a place where everyone else around them is extremely productive. When ambition is the norm in such an environment, it’s quite easy for one to measure success based on others’ successes. The challenge is that there will always be somebody who does it better than oneself. Some other person who has a better internship opportunity, a better LinkedIn page, and an ideal plan for the next five years. And Berkeley happens to be full of very ambitious people.
When productivity becomes a personality trait
At some point, it became trendy to be “busy”. When you ask any Berkeley student how he/she is doing, it’s almost guaranteed that one will say something along the lines of “I’m so busy” or “Actually, I’m drowning in all that homework”. While it’s perfectly understandable, it’s worth exploring why exhaustion became so typical for students’ self-descriptions. There is a tendency to romanticize being busy. All-nighters spent in the library, continuous series of meetings, survival on coffee become signs of an ambitious college student.
Not even spare time can be used without having some goals to achieve. Going to the gym is to get fit, reading books is to educate yourself, joining various clubs is to add yet another resume builder. Even personal interests and hobbies somehow should serve the purpose and contribute to the construction of one’s image. Every minute has to be used properly and with intention. It seems like there’s no place left to simply exist.
The fear of falling behind
But maybe the most draining aspect of Berkeley’s hustle culture is not the sheer work involved. It’s the continuous notion that others are doing better than we are. Announcements on LinkedIn, internships, research, graduate school applications are achievements that give the illusion that all our peers are continuously achieving new heights.
Of course, one should celebrate others’ accomplishments, but at the same time, it’s hard to escape from the belief that other people’s successes somehow say something about our personal failures. While college is believed to be a period of exploration and self-realization, the fact remains that these four years are expected to serve as a preparation ground for the future career. People should experience new things, but also compile an impressive resume. People should try different things but choose a career in what he discovered. This contradiction is draining, and the irony is that by preparing for the future so thoroughly, we miss out on the present.
Redefining what success looks like
Perhaps the solution is not throwing out ambition completely but rather recognizing that one’s successes need not be equated with one’s identity. It doesn’t always have to mean landing an illustrious internship or creating a flawless career path. It might also mean taking a little time out for dinner with your friends despite a huge to-do list. It could mean spending an afternoon on the Glade without worrying about the work waiting back home. It may be taking a course not for any pragmatic reason but simply because you enjoy the topic.
It means giving oneself the freedom to embrace college for what it is. Because let’s face it, no one is expected to know everything at twenty. Everyone is entitled to change his mind, take breaks, make mistakes, and follow up on things that may not necessarily lead to professional success. Berkeley will forever be an institution of very ambitious, hard-working students. That is the beauty of this university. Perhaps people can be taught how to appreciate times of inactivity as well. After all, everybody has worked very hard to get to this point.