Since its premier, the latest installment of the Marvel Cinematic Universe has earned 527.7 million USD and and quickly shot to number 1 in Canada (sparking this response from director Taika Waititi). Instead of doing a regular review, because at this point we all already know that it’s incredible, I will be illustrating my reactions to Thor: Ragnarok with appropriate gifs.
Let this be your spoiler warning; though if you haven’t seen it by this point, what are you waiting for?
1. Thor is being held hostage by Surtur (a fiery being whose eyebrow game is on point).
Surtur: “Thor, Son of Odin”
Thor: “Surtur, Son of… a bitch! I thought you were dead!”
Me:
2. Loki and Thor stand in front of the rubble that was once Shady Oaks Old Folks Home, where Loki had stashed Odin so the trickster could rule Asgard and watch melodramatic plays.
Loki: “I swear he was here when I left him”
Me:
3. Every single scene featuring Jeff Goldblum as the eternally charming yet sleazy Grandmaster of Sakaar.
Jeff Goldblum: *is Jeff Goldblum*
Me:
4. Taika Waititi cameos as Korg, an alien made of rocks with a penchant for taking things at face value and who is way too laid back to start any sort of revolution.
Korg: “I’m made of rocks, as you can see, but don’t let that intimidate you. You don’t need to be afraid, unless you’re made of scissors! Just a little Rock, Paper, Scissors joke for you.”
Me:
5. Hulk smashes into the Grandmaster’s arena, yelling like an angry goat-lion.
Me and Thor:
6. Bruce Banner and Thor’s awkward bro moment when one goes for a high five and the other goes for a fist bump.
Bruce and Thor: create a hand turkey
Me:
7. Valkyrie being the strong, witty warrior we should all aspire to be, minus the alcoholism.
Valkyrie: jumps effortlessly through the air chopping down spaceships left and right
Me:
8. Hela fights Thor, winning easily and beating him to a pulp, then…
Hela: “What were you the God of again?”
Thor: *produces biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning blasts*
Me:
9. Led Zeppelin’s Immigrant Song comes on.
Shit: goes down
Me:
Based on the Jeff Goldblum Ranking scale, I agree with the great man himself and award this film 10/10 Goldblums. So, I repeat, please go see this wonderful movie, I am sure you won’t regret it (unlike the new Justice League movie, which you might regret deeply).
credits: rottentomatoes.com, giphy.com