Just this past weekend, I went to a concert in Denver and had an awkward experience with a band member that plays in one of my favorite bands. I don’t want to put anyone on blast, that’s not what this article is for, but I watched an awful interaction between this member and a fan, and unfortunately, it wasn’t the first time I’d witnessed a similar situation from this band in particular.
On top of this interaction, I also happened to be listening to a podcast from two members of The Maine this afternoon where they talked about paid meet and greets. The podcast and the interaction I witnessed this weekend have been on my mind and I’ve been mulling over the way bands meet fans, whether it’s on the street or in a paid meet and greet setting. I’ve met a lot of different artists in different settings, so I was kind of comparing all of my interactions and if the setting influenced them. To be honest, they really do. I’ll get into why in just a second.
For the sake of clarity, I’m going to use the unnamed band I saw the interaction with and The Maine as my examples. To start, the unnamed band has paid meet and greets while The Maine has made it very known that they will never make a fan pay to meet them. This already presents a huge difference in the bands’ demeanors, as the unnamed band has been rude to its fans before when they’ve been outside of the paid meet and greet setting, while The Maine has never been known to have poor experiences from fans and are constantly praised for being so kind.
In the podcast, Pat and Garrett from The Maine were talking all about how paid meet and greets are toxic, to sum it up. I won’t directly quote it but, at one point, they mentioned the ego that comes with getting extra money from fans to have a second-long, weird and forced interaction with band members. The bands that have paid meet and greets seem to have no care or concern for the interactions they have while in this setting because it’s typically a quick “hello,” a photo and then you are on your way.
I can attest to this, as I’ve been in a paid meet and greet setting. Though it was actually gifted to me instead of me paying for it, the interaction was still short and sweet and there was no time for a conversation. It was rushed and stressful, which is not how I want to feel when I’m meeting bands I’ve supported for so long. I want to get to know them and let them get to know me. It’s really cool when I get a few minutes with a band member and we get to actually converse human-to-human. With paid meet and greets, you don’t get that. This leaves less work on the band’s part and more money on the fan’s part, which is kind of horrible, even if the band doesn’t realize this. When you look at it, fans are dollar signs. It seriously takes money for a band to talk to an individual for maybe 5 seconds when the fan has probably spent hours listening to the band’s music? It’s such a screwed up dynamic.
With this type of meet and greet in mind, The Maine then touched on their methods of meet and greets. They’re always free, even if the band stands outside in the cold or burning heat for hours to meet hundreds of individuals. On the podcast, Pat and Garrett talked about their Warped campaign in 2016: “Why would you pay money to meet human being?” Pat said other bands were frustrated with them for creating that message, which obviously gives paid meet and greets a bad look (rightfully so, though). Pat said they want to do this because not only do they just love their fans and want to give them the experiences they deserve for buying tickets to their shows, but because it gains lifelong supporters way more than a paid meet & greet ever will.
This conversation and the entire podcast spoke to every concert-goers heart because The Maine get it. They understand fans aren’t always able to afford more than a ticket and they understand how much their music means to people that go to their shows. They also understand the value behind an interaction from someone you look up to and no matter how the interaction goes-good or bad- fans will carry that with them forever. Though not every band is horrible to their fans and has paid meet and greets, it really throws things into perspective for the musicians that do make their fans pay for an interaction. If The Maine have acquired a huge following in their scene, it’s obviously not impossible to make a living without those hefty meet and greet prices.
With all of this in mind, I just want to touch on the interaction I saw this weekend. With the unnamed band, they are known to be nice in the paid meet and greet setting, but not in settings where fans are just on the street asking to meet them and have a picture. After experiencing an unfortunate interaction between this band member and a fan, I remember feeling like my heart was ripped from my chest. I couldn’t believe the band actually has such a concern with being treated like they are untouchable, rather than getting on the fan’s level and seeing things through their eyes. Even if this particular member didn’t want to interact with the fan, he could’ve said, “Sorry, I have to go right now, but thank you for coming to the show” rather than getting angry at her for pulling him from whatever he was doing. I left that night unsure of whether I wanted to support this band anymore because I’ve seen a couple poor interactions from them to realize this is probably how they always are outside of set-up meet and greets.
I get it, paid meet and greets are a way to gain some extra cash from fans and the fans choose to buy them. But, I also have to side with The Maine on their perspective and everything I’ve mentioned above. Music is usually made by people who simply want to make music. Majority of the bands I’ve met and interacted with have made it clear that they don’t care about money. They care about the art they create and the people it impacts.
Even if an artist decides they want paid meet and greets, they should bear in mind that they will see fans at places they go to eat or by the tour bus or outside the venues they just played. There are going to be outside interactions with fans that they cannot always expect. Even if the bands choose not to stick around and talk with them, there are many ways to turn them down without making it a horrible interaction that will make the fan and other fans witnessing it feel unimportant and hated. It may sound dramatic, but those interactions can save lives. I’ve seen so many people meeting bands telling them how they stopped self-harming because of their songs or that they almost committed suicide, but thanks to the new album a band released, the fan is still here. That impact is huge and when bands are rude to fans that have gained so much from the band’s music, it can be world-shattering.
I could go on for so long about paid meet and greets because I’m 1000% against them, but I’ll end with this: if every band with a platform took a step back from their pedestal they’ve been placed on to see things from an average fan’s perspective, it would make a huge difference in how they treat those who support them. Without the fans, bands wouldn’t make money and I wish they took that a little more seriously. Hopefully this unnamed band and any others that feel like they can treat fans poorly without repercussions will have a wake-up call before all of their fans leave them to wonder where their career went.