People with uteruses! If you are smart and sexually active, you’ve probably given protection a try. There are a number of different forms of contraception, and it can be overwhelming finding which one will be best for you. The first thing to know about birth control is that it works differently for everyone. What didn’t work for me could be the best thing that’s ever happened to you. Your friend might love one type, but you might end up hating it. After three years and three different kinds of birth control, I’ve finally figured out what works best for me, but it wasn’t easy.
I was seventeen when I took a deep breath and walked into my mom’s room and asked the question I’d been trying to ask for days- “what do you think about me going on birth control?”
Her response didn’t ease my nerves. “Why?”
The last thing I wanted to do was explain to my mom out loud why I would possibly need birth control. She wasn’t conservative and always said I was free to do what I wanted when it came to my body, but it was clear that she didn’t want any part in my sex life. I had only brought it up because the Internet turned out to be full of misinformation and I literally had no idea where to start, but it was clear I was on my own.
Condoms
Condoms are the only form of birth control that prevents STI’s, so they are usually the best option for a lot of people. You can buy them without a prescription, and they’re about 98% effective. According to Young Women’s Health, they are only 82% effective with typical use (as in sometimes people mess up). My current boyfriend and I had started our long-term relationship a few months before and were both STI free, so I started looking into other options. Don’t get me wrong, I would highly recommend condoms for most situations, and this is in no way an excuse for anyone to not wear one, but they just aren’t always ideal. Some users complain that they decrease sensitivity, and you can actually be allergic to the latex as well (although there are latex-free varieties). There are also female condoms available that are a little less common. Since most of my prescriptions are covered by my health insurance, condoms were also one of the only types of birth control I had to pay for since they were over-the-counter. However, it is pretty easy to get free condoms at schools and clinics. Other forms of birth control might be useful if you’re in a monogamous relationship where both partners have been checked for diseases, are looking for backup prevention, or if you’re wanting other benefits like a lighter period or clearer skin.
Birth Control Pill
After swinging and missing with both the Internet and my mom, I booked an appointment with my family doctor. I was hoping for an in-depth conversation about what would work best for me, but ended up leaving the appointment after a few minutes. As soon as I mentioned what I was looking for, my doctor pulled out her pad and wrote me a prescription for the Alesse 28 birth control pill. It seemed like nobody, not even my mom or doctor, was comfortable talking about protection, and I started to feel like I was doing something wrong.
You take the pill for twenty-one days, and then skip it for seven, in which time you’ll have your period. You take it around the same time everyday, and it prevents the release of an egg during your menstrual cycle. It contains two hormones: a progestin and an estrogen. The pill not only prevents pregnancy, but can also help regulate your period, treat acne, and reduce the risk of ovarian cysts. Some normal side effects involve weight gain, breast growth, and spotting. It is 99% effective if taken perfectly, which, in my experience, turned out to be pretty difficult.
I was on Alesse for six months. I took it at 8:00 in the morning every day, which was probably my first mistake. Whenever I slept in on weekends I started to literally dream that I had taken my pill, then would wake up thinking I actually had. I wouldn’t notice until the next day, and per package instruction, take two at once. Every time I took two at the same time, without fail, I would throw up. Something about the hormones just didn’t work with my body. I’ve had friends that have taken up to four at a time (definitely not recommended) who were fine, so I can’t emphasize enough that it is different for everybody. There are many different brands of the pill, and if one isn’t working for you but you’re set on sticking with this method, it’s very normal to just try a different brand. I decided to just drop it completely. I had multiple close calls and would nearly cry every time I realized I’d forgotten a pill and would have to take two. A disappointing number of people I’ve spoken with who are on the pill haven’t heard of other options, and even if you don’t have a problem remembering to take it, I feel like if there are easier options you might as well give them a try.
NuvaRing
After six months I switched to NuvaRing. It’s a flexible ring about the size of your thumb and pointer finger shaped into a circle. You insert it into your vagina yourself, which scares a lot of people off but really isn’t hard. The ring stays there for three weeks, and is taken out for a week, during which time you have your period. Then you put a new one in for another three weeks. You take it out on the same day and around the same time every month. It works by releasing the same hormones as the pill into your system, which means it has similar side effects. On a day-to-day basis I never felt the ring, and never had any difficulties with it. I did have to take it out during sex, which probably isn’t recommended, but it would tug and pull and sometimes hurt if I didn’t. I never asked if that was okay to do, but the package does say you will still be protected if it falls out for any less than 48 hours. The best part was how regulated my periods were. I knew down to the hour when I was going to get it, and exactly when it would end. You can also skip periods safely by replacing a ring immediately with a new one instead of leaving them out for a week. This is very handy when you’re going on vacation of have a specific event coming up that you don’t want to deal with your period for.
But in the end even the ring ended up being too much work for me. I hated going to my doctor or to a clinic to refill my prescription, even after a random doctor at the clinic gave me a yearlong prescription – I hated going to Shoppers Drug Mart every three months to pick the rings up. I was also bad at remembering when I needed to pick up more, or to bring one with me when I went back home for long weekends. After nearly two years on NuvaRing and a particularly bad Shoppers experience, I did a bit of research then booked an appointment at the campus clinic.
IUD
At my first appointment I sat down with the doctor and told her I was hoping to get an IUD, which stands for intrauterine device. IUDs are small, T-shaped hooks that are inserted into the uterus by a doctor. There are two types: copper and hormonal. Coppers IUDs are effective for up to twelve years and non-hormonal, which would be great for anyone who doesn’t react well to hormones. I opted for the Mirena, which is a hormonal IUD and lasts five years. It is the most effective birth control method, and it’s impossible to mess up on because once it’s inserted you don’t have to think about it for five years. I was unsure of it at first because a lot of websites said you could only have one inserted after you had given birth, which isn’t true at all and it’s probably embarrassing that I even believed that. I also read some horror stories about the IUD piercing people’s uteruses, but the doctor told me it was rare. I was intrigued by the average 90% reduction of menstrual flow, and that a lot of users stop getting their periods altogether. There is some cramping after insertion, and you can spot for up to seven weeks. My doctor at the campus clinic was incredibly nice and helped me pick what type of IUD would work best. She gave me a prescription after my first appointment and I booked two more. The first was for an STI check, since having an IUD inserted while you have a disease can obviously cause a lot of problems. The second was the actual insertion. You pick up the IUD yourself from the drugstore. This was the first type of prescription birth control I actually had to pay for because it was so expensive. I was nearly completely covered, but without insurance it would have been around $400. That seems expensive, but I was told over the five-year period it actually adds up to being the cheapest form of birth control.
I’m not going to lie, the insertion HURT. It was like the worst period cramp you’ve ever had, times ten. I had some pretty nasty cramps for the first couple days, and spotted for about a week, but I haven’t seen any sign of it since. Just take a Tylenol before you go and carry a hot water bottle with you everywhere. Two months after the insertion, I couldn’t be happier with it. It is so nice never having to worry about when to take a pill or if I need to pick up my prescription. I would definitely tell anyone to at least talk to their doctor about it and consider having it inserted. If this experience has taught me anything it’s to ask a lot of questions, and not to settle for something you don’t want just because you might think it’s the only option.
Birth Control Patch
There are of course different methods I haven’t tried. One is the Patch, which looks like a band-aid that you stick to your skin for three weeks, remove it for a week, and replace it with a new one. The main supplier, Ortho Evra, has stopped making them, but they are still possible to find. I decided against trying it because it is very much like the ring but I’d have a visible sticker on my body that I didn’t really want. It’s 99% effective if used perfectly, and 91% with typical use. It has similar side effects to the pill and NuvaRing.
Depo-Provera
Depo-Provera is a shot in the arm or butt that protects you against pregnancy for three months. This is great if you’re looking for long-term protection but don’t want an object inserted permanently into your uterus. It’s hard to mess up, since you’ll have your appointments booked, and many users stop getting their periods. I’m not necessarily scared of needles, but I tend to avoid them when possible, so I never really considered going on it.
Barrier Methods
This includes the contraceptive sponge, the diaphragm, and the cervical cap. All three are some sort of block full of spermicide that is inserted into the vagina and then stops and kills sperm. I never considered them, mostly because I didn’t know anyone who had ever tried them. Apparently some people find them messy, and they are usually left inside the vagina between twenty-four to forty-eight hours. These are great if you don’t react well to hormones.
Implant
A small rod is inserted into your arm by a healthcare professional and can stay there for up to three years. This is basically an IUD that goes into your arm. For some reason having it in my arm made me more nervous then having it in my uterus, so I never gave it a try.
Withdrawal
Also known as the pull-out method. It involves the person with a penis pulling out before ejaculation. I get pretty confused when this is even listed as a birth control method because by definition it is pretty much the lack thereof. Don’t use it.
I’m finally happy with my birth control, and the entire experience of finding it turned out to be both educational and empowering. I learned to go after what I wanted and make changes as soon as I realized something wasn’t working. I encourage all of you to do your research and push to have in-depth conversations with people who can help you. Always consult a doctor before starting any of these methods, and remember to be checked regularly for STIs and cervical cancer. Have fun, and be safe!