In modern day dating, it’s pretty likely you’ve either been left on read or left someone on read. “Ghosting” has become a household term among millennials and the younger generations, and as much as it sucks to have your messages left unanswered and your feelings unresolved , sometimes we all have our reasons. Here’s some stories from women who have been the one who ghosted:
“Back in high school, I was in Grade 11, and this guy was in Grade 12. I walked into his work one day, not knowing who he was, and we absolutely clicked. We chatted for a good 15 minutes, and that night he messaged me on Instagram. We went to the same school, so eventually we went out for lunch. Then we hung out one night, and one thing led to another, and we slept together. He stopped responding to my texts eventually, and he only ever messaged me when he wanted to sleep with me again. I don’t know if it was me being naive, or if I just wanted to be wanted, but I always gave in to him. A year later, I finally realized he was manipulating me, and after constantly being ignored, stood up during the day, and overall not being treated well, I stopped replying. He would message me at 3am, asking to go out, and I was finally fed up with it. Every time he texted me, I opened it and reminded myself that I was better than that; I realized I had value, and worth. That’s when I started to love myself.”
– Martina, 18
“The day after a wild night of over-drinking, blacking out, making out with too many people, and throwing up all over my friend’s truck was not a nice day. It got even worse when one of my so called ‘hook-ups’ messaged me a simple ‘hey’. A total and complete stranger to sober me, but apparently drunk us had gotten quite comfy together. After exchanging a few messages and talking about the events of the previous night, it was no joke – I’d made a total fool of myself. Somehow this kind soul seemed to be quite understanding and we continued talking for the rest of the day. I thought ‘Hey, maybe there are some decent 17 year-old guys out there!’ and this one actually wanted to get to know me! Later that night though, after dinner, the ‘Hey, so are you gonna come and act like you did last night?’ text proved me wrong. Rolling my eyes and tossing my phone to the side, it was the first official time I didn’t just leave someone on read, but deleted their number and never gave them another thought.”
– Paige, 20
“This is the story of my very LAST Tinder date ever. I’d randomly agreed to meet one of my Tinder matches this summer on a day off from work. I was bored, and while his pictures weren’t super telling, he didn’t seem too bad. Long story short, he showed up with blood on his tank-top after he had jumped into the harbour during brunch with friends earlier that morning. He started telling me personal stories about his life that made me super uncomfortable. The guy was nice enough to buy my drink for me though, and to one up that he even offered me an edible; out of all the substances you’re not supposed to take from strangers, I’d say candy and drugs are both fairly high up the list. After three hours of listening to him talk, I offered to drive him home to his sister’s,where he was living on her couch at the age of 27. Afterwards he messaged me saying that he’d had a really good time and would love to see me again. I thought it best just not to answer and leave things be. He also tried to add me on Snapchat via my phone number and I vetoed that pretty darn quick.”
– Maida, 20
“The most recent guy I left on read was a guy from high school who was blatantly rude to me any time I didn’t want to hangout, so I cut him off. He came back telling me he wished things were different.”
– Rachel, 21
“In high school I fell head-over-heels for an adorable German exchange student. We ended up dating and stayed together until his exchange year was over and he had to go back. I was interested in continuing the relationship because I really adored him and thought there was potential for us as a couple. However, he didn’t seem quite so interested in staying together and ended things with me before leaving. Even after he moved back we stayed in touch and talked over Facebook messenger consistently. My crush on him never really went away, and I guess I was always pining for us to be a thing. This all changed after we had a conversation on sexual assault he stated that he thought it was the victim’s fault in the situation. This is so far from what I know to be true, and I was absolutely appalled that he thought that way. In that very moment, any feelings I had for him completely dissipated and I cut him off. I haven’t looked back since and absolutely have zero regrets”
– Cee, 20
“I have known the boy in question since I was in elementary school, and we also went to the same high school. We were never in the same group of friends, but it was a pretty small school so we went to most of the same parties. His older sister was good friends with my older brother and he would occasionally be at my house. I would typically hide in my room until he left because I never really liked him and wanted to hangout braless without his prying teenage boy eyes. He was part of a crew of boys that called themselves the ‘Wolf Pack’, and I’m not making that up, as much as I wish I could. Since graduation, whether I had a boyfriend or not, he messaged me constantly, usually simply saying ‘Hey’. Sometimes he would send a few within a week, or he could go months in between messages, but they never were over three words long. After years, this had just exhausted me, I can’t think of a better example of someone not taking a hint. I recently deleted him from Facebook and haven’t received a message since! Though the situation did make for a pretty awkward encounter when I was in my hometown and he delivered my pizza!”
– Rachel, 21