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What I Learned From My First Heartbreak

By Sophia Lahey

Edited by Sophia Savva

So you’ve been dumped. It sucks, I know. It feels like someone has stabbed you in the heart. Your other half is gone, and now you feel like you’re falling apart. Although it may feel this way right now, it won’t last forever. Yes, I know that this advice is cliché, but it is true. Let me tell you why.

First, after this feeling of immediate pain, is the longing for things to be good and to go back to how they were. But they won’t, no matter how hard you try: what has happened was meant to be. You will soon realize that.

Next, is this feeling of falling. Have you ever fell for a long time, either by sky diving, bungee jumping, or going on a roller coaster? At first, you think, “Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap, I’m falling, help, I’m falling” but then it turns into more of: “Oh, okay, so I’m falling, here I am, hmm this isn’t so bad,” and then right back to “Oh crap, I’m falling.”

Then you start trying to grab whoever you can find around you, whether they are friends, family, a rebound–anyone there willing to hold onto you, fall with you, to let you know that whatever happens, they’ve got you.

And finally, the realization that you will eventually land on the ground and, more importantly, on your feet comes. You will slowly realize everything that was up in the air that you were holding onto wasn’t worth it. Yes, it was fun and meant a lot to you, but that wasn’t what you wanted.

You start to remember the little things you brushed away because you were so in love–like the fact that they didn’t like dogs. Or they took things that were important to you, like feminism, and turned them into a joke. Or even the fact that they made you feel stupid because they have a huge ego and a competitive drive that they need to be better than everyone around them (okay that was specific but you can fill in these examples with your own).

Then, you’ll realize that if it hadn’t been them, sooner or later it would have been you who jumped. You are so much better without them.

Finally, the best part about any heart break is the “glo up”. When you become the baddest, most confident you anyone has ever seen. You don’t even think about them anymore, and if you do, it’s because of how stupid they were for dumping you.

Your heart may seem fragile right now, but you are stronger than you know. Surround yourself with people who love you and who will hold onto you, land with you, and fall with you all over again. Remember, no matter how much you want things to go back to how they were, you deserve better. You will get through this, and you will realize that everything happens for a reason. And that reason is going to be amazing. You will land.

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