Edited by Sophia Savva
“I’m sorry but I can’t do this anymore.”
Possibly one of the worst things you can hear from your significant other.
I ended a long term relationship in April, probably one of the lowest points in my first year. My then high school boyfriend and I dated for nearly a year and a half before calling it quits…via text message. I vaguely remember much of that night except crying into a book of Sylvia Plath poems and a tub of Breyers ice cream. I walked into my ENG140 exam the next day sleep deprived and exhausted from cramming a semester’s worth of novels and crying over boys within a single night.
If you’re like myself, you probably experienced a harsh breakup with a significant other and do not know what to do next (or are probably swearing off from dating ever again). Good news: You ARE going to get over it, whether it be within a few weeks, months or perhaps days. Within a few weeks, I was already up and going, enjoying life, friends and passions. How did I do it? Below are a few helpful tips on bouncing back from a messy breakup.
It’s Okay to Cry
It’s perfectly normal to cry after a breakup, though it is not normal to wallow in your pain to the point where it takes over your personal life. Take a moment to ball your eyes out, throw your box of chocolates and yell at your TV Screen (a la Legally Blonde). Express and vent out your emotions in a healthy way.
Stay Away from Tinder
Pretty self-explanatory. Stay away from the complicated mess that is Tinder, especially when you are not emotionally ready for a relationship, much less a hook up. Zone out from dating apps and profiles until you find that you are ready to do so. Do not date or sleep with someone out of spite of your ex. Not only are you hurting the other person, but you are hurting yourself.
Confide in your Girl Squad
I credit my amazing friends and sorority sisters for helping me bounce back after getting dumped before finals. I had several listening ears and hands to pat me on the shoulder when ranting about my love life. I also had friends advise me not to do certain things (see above).
Having a great support system is vital when helping you heal. Reach out to close friends and let go of that inner tension.
ADDED BONUS: Having 40 girls going after your ex for breaking your heart.
Pursue your Passions
“I’ll show you how valuable Elle Woods can be.”
We all strive to be Elle Woods at Harvard Law School after getting dumped. *Cue the motivational music and studying montage*
Use your time to pursue your passions and take up some great projects. Fall in love with your work and invest time into building your personal image.
Getting dumped left me wanting to do better and be better. I felt motivated to do more and take up several writing projects. Within the coming weeks, I ended up getting an article retweeted by my sorority’s headquarters, being hired as an Editor and meeting Chelsea Clinton at a book signing.
Channel your anger, heartbreak and sadness in a healthy way through some passion projects.
You will Find Love
At the end of the day, someone is probably watching you from afar. You are worthy of love and you deserve to find someone deserving of your love. If they cannot see your true potential, they are not worthy of your time and are completely missing out. You never know where a breakup may lead.