I visited one of my best friends at her school, Washington University in St. Louis, a couple weekends ago. I had a great time and enjoyed my trip, but I have some advice you should employ if you go to another campus as a guest that I learned the hard way.
1. Only visit someone you are very good friends with. You have no idea what the sleeping arrangement will be. You could be sharing a twin bed with your friend. You could be sleeping on her floor. You could be sleeping on her and her suitemate’s couch. Especially if she has multiple suitemates, you want someone who will vouch for you and make sure that you have space in the bathroom and access to food. Though it may seem fun to slum it with an eh-friend from high school, you will end up regretting it. Spending some 48 hours straight in tight quarters is something that should only be done with best friends.
2. Expect to spend a lot of money. Your friend will have planned for a (hopefully) special weekend. This means doing things out of the ordinary like going downtown to a famous restaurant or going shopping. With travel expenses, food and cab fares, you will definitely not be cutting costs over the weekend.
3. If you have other friends at the same school and there is a chance you could run into them, let them know you are coming. It’s the polite thing to do. Nothing is more awkward than coming across someone you should have probably told you were coming. You are by no means obligated to set aside hours for them (you’re only visiting for a couple of days), but saying hi is the right thing to do.
4. If your friend is going through a rough emotional patch (for example, something boy-related), maybe wait a few weeks before visiting for your own sake. Parties are fun. That’s a fairly reliable tenet of college. But when you go to a party where you know only one person, and she is dead set on “getting over” someone—it starts to look grim. At a large party, no worries—no one will realize you’re an outsider. However, you will feel uncomfortable in no time at a small party. With your one segue to the other people drunkenly hugging anyone who walks through the front door, you can follow this advice: If she’s having fun and doesn’t seem to be looking to leave anytime soon, you should set an hour timer and cope. Once the hour has elapsed, you can let her know that you’re tired and going to head back. Chances are she will realize it’s time to leave. Parties are very hit or miss when you visit friends; your experience depends heavily on the quality of your host.
Keep in mind that the best part of your trip will be spending time with your friend and seeing what life is like at other schools—and ultimately appreciating Penn all that much more.