Whether you’re single, in a relationship, or have multiple friends it’s important to learn how to be independent and enjoy the time you have with yourself. In between school, work, internships, the gym, and your social and love life, you may find moments of your day when you’re alone. Those only-you moments may be spent mindlessly scrolling on TikTok and Instagram to distract you from the fact that you have nothing to do and everyone you do know is busy.
I have amazing friends, but they still have their own lives outside of me and in some moments it’s only me, myself and I. In those moments it’s time to put those big girl pants on and learn how to be independent!
going out Alone
One of the best things you can do to feel more comfortable with spending time alone is to go out alone. It could be something small like trying a new coffee shop, going for a walk, or thrifting. Going out alone will not only remind you of loads of other people that take themselves on coffee dates but can even help you against social anxiety. A tip to not feel awkward while doing things alone is to be listening to music while you are out. It blocks out the awkward silence you may experience with your barista while waiting for your coffee. Bring a book, journal or schoolwork to make it look like you have a purpose for going out alone.
be creative
When you are out in public, be the main character! TAKE PHOTOS. One of my new year’s resolutions was to take more photos whether it’s for yourself or to collect for a bomb photo dumb for later. Taking photos will remind you how cool your life is, even if it feels ordinary. Especially when you are out doing things alone it gives you the motivation to do cool things, wear an instagramable outfit and look good FOR YOU. It will also give you the boost of confidence you may need.
indulge in your hobbies
A more budget-friendly option to make the time you spend with yourself special without spending twenty dollars on an iced vanilla latte with oat milk and white chocolate matcha cookie is to start a new hobby! Some of my favourite hobbies are reading, journaling, making playlists, watercolour painting and watching movies. These are easy ways to pass time at home without having to go out and spend money, but you’re still able get to know yourself better. You might discover what book genre is your favourite or discover new songs and artists. This also gives you an opportunity to have more conversation starters when you do want to be a social creature and converse with others.
acceptance
The last thing I would say about becoming your own best friend is to accept the loneliness. Although it’s terrible to say, at some moments you are a loner. Feeling lonely is an awful feeling but how can you feel lonely when you become your own best friend? Honestly sometimes doing things alone is better than doing them with someone else. One of my favourite things to do is to go shopping alone. There is no pressure to be quick when browsing or trying things off because everything is on your schedule.
I’m not saying to isolate yourself from everyone but spending some time alone is a great chance to charge your social battery without just wasting hours doing nothing and get to know yourself more. At the end of the day, humans are social creatures and there is no greater company than your friends but it’s not bad to learn how to appreciate your lonely moments.