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The Best Places to Poop on Campus

Let’s face it: we all poop. Whether you like to admit it or not, it happens (maybe more often than we’d like for a few of us unfortunate souls). How are we able to sit anywhere on campus drinking a large coffee without expecting to have to run to the washroom sooner or later? Pooping should never be a limiting experience, so Her Campus uOttawa has your back when it comes to where to poop on campus. And believe me, I’ve done a lot of research. Hand picked are the best washroom spots on campus based on cleanliness, toilet paper quality, noise level, and traffic.

1. Pretty much anywhere above the 2nd floor in Simard
What even is this place? To non-arts students, it’s a maze and a place you didn’t even know existed until now. Simard has been a building for me that usually ropes me in for 7-10pm classes. You have to eat dinner during these lecture, though, right? You don’t need to fear… Simard washrooms are empty. You could literally be there for 3 hours and no one would question it. 

2. Desmarais – Floor 3
The first floor is… hit and miss. Sometimes I see beer and energy drink cans stuffed in between the toilet seats but whatever, it’s fine. The second floor is a little bit better, but the third floor is the holy grail of toilets. It’s kept clean because no one really goes there even though it is a bit small. I’d suggest just kind of walking past the first floor DMS washroom, though, unless you want to play a game of “Where’s Waldo?” where Waldo is actually someone’s sock left behind. One thing we can always count on in DMS washrooms is the stall graffiti. It was always heartwarming to see “DESTROY CAPITALISM” written in bright pink letters. Art.

3. Bioscience Complex – In the back hallway behind the laboratories
The washrooms in BSC near the general study quarters is alright, but the washrooms at the end of the long “L” shaped hallway are huge and clean. They also have automated sinks and dryers, which are always welcome. It’s also quiet and no one will likely bother you while you’re in there. 

4. Colonel By is the saviour we asked for but don’t deserve
Pretty much all the floors on Colonel By are pretty clean and nice. Usually, you have to walk up to the higher floors of buildings to find a passable pooping option, but Colonel By really just passes on all levels. It’s a nice refreshing change to be able to go anywhere within a building to use the washroom and not wonder how gross it’ll be. The best place in CBY, however, is the bottom floor right before you enter the used-to-be tunnel that would guide you to MacDonald (RIP). 

5. Lamoureux
I had a class in LMX last semester on the 4th floor and let me tell you, the washrooms are clean. They’re basically sparkling white and whenever I went in they had the fresh smell of cleaning products. The toilet paper also isn’t thin like it usually is in other buildings… *cough* SITE *cough*. I don’t know if anyone really uses these because let’s be real: who really has classes on higher Lamoureux levels? The only thing I’d warn you about, though, are the automatic toilets. Automatic toilets are pretty much why I have trust issues, so let’s just do the next person a favour and leave that trusty piece of toilet paper behind blocking the sensor. 

6. BONUS – Don’t bother pooping in FSS
I don’t know why I even try with FSS. The first floor’s first stall doesn’t even close properly, the second floor’s stall locked me in once, and the third floor… we don’t talk about the third floor. And to top it off, the first few floors’ hand sanitizer machines are always empty. Seriously? It’s usually a general rule that washroom cleanlieness increases with floor elevation, but I’m sorry…I’m not going to go all the way up to the 15th floor to sit on a toilet. 

Let us know if we missed your favourite spot in the comments. Hopefully next time you’ll think twice about completing your business in high traffic areas and next time try out the lesser known little guys. They deserve some loving.


Sources: Cover Photo

Jesse Lesniowski, a 22 year-old student at uOttawa in the Environmental Science program. Loves writing, gardening, coffee, wine and making new memories.
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