What is the let them theory?
Mel Robbins’ “Let Them Theory” is the idea of not letting the things around you interfere with your life and success. It is telling yourself to let your friends leave you out, or let your roommate trash your room, because that stuff is out of your control. There is only one thing in this world that you can truly control, and that is your brain. The let them theory helps people manipulate their brains into not letting other people dampen their lives (For more information on this book, I highly recommend reading it).
Does the let them theory actually work?
I recently was going through a hard time, my mental health was at a low, and I needed something in my life to boost me up. So naturally, the first thing I did was go to Target to find a good book to distract myself. I ended up in the mental health section and started reading the back of most of these books to find something that could help me get out of this funk. I found the “Let Them Theory” by Mel Robbins, and I was very intrigued as I had heard great things about it, so I decided to give it a try.
I can’t even make this up, but after the first chapter, I already felt like the techniques were working. I had a situation earlier in the day that was bothering me, so I used the let them technique to try to get over it. I thought about the situation, and I repeated to myself, “Let them do this,” “Let them do that,” “Let them,” and honestly, it worked. Every time I think about that specific situation, I can tell myself, let them, take a deep breath, and move on.
Although this might not be the case for everyone, it worked for me because I had such a deep want for it to work, and I made sure to say it to myself every time something was bothering me, and I still do. I think it can be a handy tool, especially when something is out of your control, but it also takes a lot of your own mental strength to use, and when you feel like it worked, it’s almost like gaslighting yourself.
I think the let them theory is helpful overall, given it has a scientific background and has proven to work, but you have to really want it to work for it to work.