A lot of us may have come into college thinking this is our chance to meet someone the old fashioned way. We are out of highschool and away from the same people we have been in classes with since 6th grade, so it is finally time to find that boyfriend or girlfriend we deserve.
I am very aware that you CAN still meet people in person, but I hate to break it to you: times are changing and it is not that easy. You walk into a coffee shop: everyone has headphones in. You sit next to someone in a lecture: they have a long distance girlfriend. You strike up a conversation with a cute girl: she is really straight, but really wants to be your friend. What I am trying to say is that on dating apps you know what people are there for, you know a little bit about them, and you know if they are interested.
Obviously dating apps don’t have a 100% success rate and not every experience on them is a good one, but I am just here to give you a rundown on my biggest takeaways and suggestions.
First of all, you need to set your intentions. Are you looking to find a special someone? Are you just looking for a hookup? Maybe experimenting? Perhaps you don’t know yet, but it seems like it could be fun (that is okay, too). You can always change your mind, but keep an open dialogue with yourself or your friends about how you are doing. Whatever it is that you decide to download those apps for, you need to continue to have honest conversations because everyone is on these apps for a different reason, and you do not want to compromise what you want just for someone who looks like they have a decent profile.
Next rule is you have to set limits. By this I mean both literal and metaphorical. Like you can lay in bed and go on TikTok for five minutes just to see it has been an hour, it is just as easy to get stuck swiping. I was an active dating app user early in the first semester, and I know my screen time was way higher than it is currently. Not only did it take up a lot of my screen time, it took up a lot of my headspace. That is the other part of regulating your limits. Your value is absolutely not determined by the randos who do or don’t swipe on you, so if it starts to feel like that, it is time to be done on the apps.
I know it is maybe the cheesiest and most annoying piece of advice of all time, but it is so true: be yourself. It is absolutely crucial for you to be honest on your profile and in your message exchanges. I am not saying the “here is my social security number” type of transparency, but I am urging you to be candid about your experience level if hooking up is new to you, or share that you are actually looking for a more serious relationship if a casual fling isn’t what you really want.
As much as I urge you to be yourself, I want to urge you to be feeling yourself! Have fun making your profile. Pick out your favorite pics you dumped on VSCO or that post that has been sitting in your Instagram drafts and put it on your profile. Be witty if you are witty or be sarcastic if you are sarcastic! Don’t hold back. Everyone is being cringey…it’s a dating app.
I am by no means calling myself an expert. I am just a college student who somehow managed to make a good enough profile for my (now) girlfriend to have swiped right on me. Are dating apps your only chance to find a partner? No, not at all. Do I hope to be sponsored by Bumble? Sure, but that’s not the point.
Maybe this is your sign to download Bumble and Tinder, or maybe this is your sign to delete them. That’s up to you.