An Open Letter to New Sorority Members

Dear New Members,

Let’s preface this by saying that I cried four times on bid day – three of those times being before you even showed up. I couldn’t believe that each and every one of you would walk up the sidewalk to our house to accept your bid. Reading all of your names, making your door decorations, and talking to all of my sisters about you was so overwhelming that I couldn’t handle it. Before I even met you, you became the most important people in my life. I couldn’t wait to embrace each and every one of you and tell you how much I love you.

But I know my overwhelming joy for you can sometimes be reciprocated by an overwhelming fear. Being a new member is hard; it’s intimidating, knowing you now have over 150 sisters. Being a part of a huge pledge class, not knowing anyone except those with whom you made awkward small talk on bid day, is terrifying. It’s so hard to find your place in a sorority, especially right after you join. You expect it to be this magical thing where you become best friends with every new sister, staying up late every night laughing over Pizza House and marathoning Grey’s Anatomy in the house until the sun rises. Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen right away, and it’s hard.

You need to remember that everyone is feeling the same way you are right now. Everyone is scared, overwhelmed, sometimes even questioning their decision to join the house. But I have to tell you: hang in there. Give it time. A sorority requires lots of time and effort; you get out of it what you put into it. Even a month in, you may still feel alone and uncomfortable, and that’s okay; I finally stopped feeling that way when I lived in the house. It’s impossible to feel completely connected to your pledge class right away but I promise, it will happen over time.

What I can tell you is this: while you may not know all of your new sisters, and while you may feel out of place in your pledge class, your new sisters know you and we will love you until the day we die. You are our everything. We live and breathe to make sure that you are happy, well taken care of, and loved beyond compare. Whenever we see you, we get so excited that all we want to do is run up and hug you because you are now a part of our family. We worked so hard, running on straight caffeine and granola bars, to have you in our house. You are living proof that our sisterhood is alive and thriving, and there is nothing better than that.

I hope you know how special you are. I hope you know that each and every new sister would drop anything and everything to make sure you were okay. I hope you know that we love you and support you, even if you feel disconnected at first. We all went through it, and that’s what has made our bonds so strong. So give it time – if you work hard to be present, to be there for your sisters and are willing to give them everything you have, you will love it. Don’t be afraid to reach out – we are here for you through all of the ups and downs. I promise. That’s what sisterhood is all about.


An active member who loves you more than life itself


Images courtesy of: Carly Griffin