At the end of December, 2024, Mel Robbins, a New York Times best-selling author and a world-renowned mindset, motivation, and behavior expert, published her most recent book, The Let Them Theory.
The Let Them Theory is a guidebook that teaches you how to stop letting other people’s judgement, feelings, and thoughts impact your own life and well-being. In the book, Mel Robbins takes readers step-by-step through their journey of freeing themselves from the hold that other people might have on them. Mel Robbins wants people to stop putting themselves in the backseat—it’s your life, so you come first. Mel Robbins frames the two seemingly simple words, “Let Them” into a mindset and movement to take control of your own life and experiences.
After her book took the shelves at local bookstores and online platforms, Mel Robbins’ podcast audio, explaining the premise of her new book, went viral. In her motivational message, she shares examples of experiences and situations where people could apply the theory. She encourages people, the next time they feel left out because a group of “friends” didn’t invite them to a gathering, ‘let them’; the person you’re dating doesn’t want to commit, ‘let them’; a company that you are working for is starting to lay more and more people off, ‘let them.’ She doesn’t say all of these things coming from a place of apathy or emotional suppression. She simply wants people to find peace and focus on what they can control in their life. She explains that, “[We all] spend so much time and energy trying to control other people and getting emotionally worked up about things that are beyond [our] control.” She relays the message that “[We] can tap into peace and true control if [we] let them be themselves.” Robbins’ book emphasizes the message that if we let people be who they truly are, we will better understand what our best move is for ourselves.
I find this theory to be rather pertinent to the college experience. It can be easy to find ourselves wrapped up in the decisions other people make and the opinions other people have, especially when they may be judgements of ourselves. However, if we apply the Let Them Theory, we can regain our own lives, brain space, and confidence back. Everyone is doing their best and living their own life. If someone makes a decision that doesn’t satisfy us or serve our purpose, let them. How we choose to respond afterwards is where we find our power.