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Hello, My Facebook Friends

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Mich chapter.

Facebook (FB), that addicting site to which many of us have fallen prey. With a few clicks, I can figure out where my old high school friend is working, which guy my friend is dating, what that guy looks like, what school he goes to, and more. The ultimate magnifying glass to dig through people’s lives. There is no need to really talk to people, well except for the direct social interaction. The thing that I find concerning is the lack of social accountability that has arisen through the accessibility of such information. I have 741 Facebook “friends,” and that number is after countless times of de-friending people with whom I have had zero interactions. Out of those hundreds of “friends,” how do you decide which people are worth reaching out to? By “reaching out” I mean anything from “liking” a status to FB messaging. I will admit, there are still people on my friends list with whom I have very little online interaction. Why do we add people as friends, if we never really interact with them? Facebook has taken on this Myspace persona, where more importance has been placed on racking up the friend numbers.  

I see the appeal in having FB friends; add someone and you’ve gotten the “okay” to creep through their lives during those dull study sessions or just out of pure curiosity. It is all fun and games when people post Instagram pictures of their artfully constructed, Nashville contrasted dinner. But when people post those distressed statuses, such as “I just can’t take it anymore,” do you ignore that? Are you not somewhat accountable because you saw that status?

I believe Facebook is a fantastic tool to keep in touch with those friends and family who lives miles away. However, we’ve lost some accountability to actually connect with others through talking in real-time. Technically, we should all be super close because we know way too much about each other. Unfortunately that’s not the case. We store those details away and turn a blind eye to those same FB friends when we see them, in real life, on the street. 

One way to resolve this dilemma is to clean up your friend list. If you have stacked up FB friends, consisting of acquaintances and old hook-ups, that you really don’t WANT to interact with again, you should de-friend them. Here’s a frustrating scenario that may occur when acquaintances end up on friend lists: I ran into a FB friend on campus and we locked eyes, yet when I smiled, they walked away confused. Awkward. Why should people have the privilege of looking into my life online, when you can’t even look me in the eyes to say “hello”?

I am a big believer in maintaining social contacts. You never know when someone can have your back personally or professionally. If I’ve met you and got along with you at some point, I hope that I can do it again! I try to put effort into a quick FB message, a wall post, or something to people when they cross my mind! That way I constantly reaffirm those friendships and people are less likely to treat me like a stranger. Try not to fall victim into becoming those passive FB-surfers, clicking through others’ profiles as if you’re window shopping. Embrace the power you have in connecting with people through the site. It is an easy way to set up a strong support system.