“Well, I blacked out last night, woke up still drunk, went to class and didn’t even know I had a quiz.”
“At 2 am I decided to restart The Office again and slept through my class and they take attendance.”
“Today was the first day I went to my discussion and I just found out there’s an in-class quiz every day.”
As I begin my second year as a college student, I’ve noticed a pattern from all of my different groups of friends: everyone is constantly one-upping one another, but not about positive achievements. There is a culture of bragging about our bad habits and it needs to be called out for creating a toxic environment.
When I say that I ate No Thai for dinner two nights in a row and really should eat healthier the next night, the reply tends to be along the lines of “well I ate feta bread every night this week and haven’t eaten a vegetable since move-in.” There is a feeling of competition around who does what “rebellious,” unhealthy habits: who procrastinated the most papers, studied the least, drank the most, and ate the least healthily.
It is comforting to know that other people aren’t perfect, have bad habits that you also have, and are also struggling to balance their lives while at college. From observing and sometimes partaking in this harsh culture starting in high school, I acknowledge that it is hard not to participate without shaming people and acting rudely. This is why we, as a culture, need to change how we speak as a whole. If someone tells you that they got three hours of sleep last night because they were writing a paper that probably wasn’t even good, don’t try to match her story; offer a positive outlook on her experience. After hearing about your friend who blacked out every night over the weekend, let her know when you’re staying in and invite her to join. Organize a dinner with your friends at a healthier restaurant instead of rotating the same unhealthy, lazy meals.
I want to point out there is a difference between venting about your day and bragging about unhealthy habits. Having complaints about your day is totally normal, and one of the best parts of my day is coming home and sharing the good and bad parts of my day with my roommates. Life happens and not everything is perfect, and your friends are there to support you and talk through rough days. However, instead of one-upping your bad story, they should encourage you to change the behavior instead.
Images courtesy of: Money Inc