VALENTINE’S DAY REIMAGINED

Typically, my Valentine’s Day consists of going out to a mediocre dinner and my boyfriend at the time getting me a bouquet of flowers for the first time in months. Coupled with an immense amount of anxiety leading up to it, because I feel the need for holidays to be perfect. The night would leave me feeling disappointed and unfulfilled. 

Today is my first Valentine’s Day I’ve spent single for more years than I can count. Weirdly enough, it’s also the first that I’m not so anxious about. 

Valentine’s Day has historically been centered around romantic love, including what you do for your significant other, and how “perfect” the day is expected to be. There’s pressure to live up to this ideal of flowers, chocolates, and a nice meal. When we don’t measure up or aren’t in a relationship, the portrayal of love promoted to us in movies, advertisements, and social media can occasionally leave us feeling anxious or let down.

However, this year I’m dedicating it to my friends, who have supported me in the most genuine of times.

My friends have been a consistent source of love and understanding as I’ve laughed, cried, vented, and celebrated life’s little moments with them. I want to celebrate that love on Valentine’s Day.

I’ve come to see that friendships can sometimes be even more satisfying than romantic relationships. The friendships I’ve built are just as valuable as, if not more so than, any romantic relationship. These are the individuals that have supported me no matter what.

This change in viewpoint feels almost liberating to me. I’ve been stressed out by Valentine’s Day for far too long, so this year, I’m switching it up. My friends should know how appreciated they are by me. Since friendships are nurtured through time, generosity, shared experiences, and concern for one another, you really don’t need a huge gesture to show you care. All you need is to vocalize how much they mean to you. 

As I consider my friends this Valentine’s Day, I come to the realization that it’s not about conforming to the ideals of romantic love. It’s about valuing the relationships that keep me going, the individuals who cheer me up when I’m feeling low, and the ones who always have my back. There is only genuine love—no expectations or checklist.

Valentine’s Day has evolved from being a conventional celebration of love between couples to a celebration of all love in my life. It’s the ones who listen to me without passing judgment, who always text me to check in, and who ensure that I never feel isolated, even when I’m by myself. Today, I would like to praise these individuals.

Being single has filled me with thankfulness rather than a sense of missing something. I’ve come to understand that love isn’t something that can be limited to a single day or a particular kind of relationship. We encounter it in a variety of ways, including the love we have for ourselves, our friends, and our family. This year, I’ve decided to think about how fortunate I am to be surrounded by positive individuals. Love like that is worthy of celebration.