Sorry Not Sorry

Sorry | adjective | sor·​ry; feeling regret, penitence, distress, or mournful.

The word sorry has become one of the most overused words in the human vocabulary and it certainly is not being used in an effective way anymore. Unless you are sincerely apologizing for hurting or wronging someone else, mindlessly tossing the word “sorry” into conversations with others becomes meaningless and in some case, can actually cause more harm than good.

It makes you look weak

While apologizing for actually hurting someone takes real strength, overusing the word sorry in unnecessary situations does the complete opposite. Saying sorry puts you in a submissive position that suggests you seek approval from other people and you'll let them walk all over you until you get it. One of the hardest things in life is realizing that you do not have to please anyone. This means learning not to apologize for every little thing you do just to avoid conflict or disagreements. Embrace your inner strength.

It diminishes your credibility and makes you seem uncertain

The word sorry is an inherent admittance to doing something wrong. This is applicable in many aspects of life, specifically in the workplace. As women, we are conditioned to apologize for practically everything. It is time to change this habit. Know your value and worth because you are just as strong and intelligent as any man. If you ask anyone, a key factor in achieving success both professionally and personally is by having confidence. The word sorry correlates to uncertainty and nervousness, thus diminishing your credibility and causing people to question if you really know what you are talking about. Be confident in your decisions and actions; if you believe in yourself, so will others!


It loses its meaning

Majority of the time, the word sorry is used even when there is nothing that needs to be apologized for! As a result, the word simply begins to lose its meaning. How will people be able to tell when you are sincerely using the word to express genuine remorse if you are using it in every other sentence? A true apology can be a beautiful thing, so give back the meaning to the word sorry by only using it when it is truly called for.


It shows insecurity in your relationships

If you are constantly apologizing to those around you, it may be a sign that you are feeling insecure in your relationship. Therefore, out of fear of offending anyone and causing tension, you overcompensate with “sorrys” in order to salvage your fragile relationships. I can guarantee you that this is not the solution! If anything, the constant apologies will only begin to bother and annoy others. The best way to strengthen your relationships with others is to first strengthen yourself. Focus on improving your own self-esteem. Once you find the appropriate balance between addressing your own needs and being considerate of others, your ability to connect with others will skyrocket and your relationships will have the potential to flourish!

Contrary to popular belief, an apology is not the only way to make amends with someone or correct your mistakes. Rather than approaching a situation with an unneeded apology, try using a statement that will reflect appreciation and gratitude as opposed to sorrow and remorse. For instance, using phrases like “Thank you for understanding” or “I appreciate your flexibility” instead of “So sorry I am late” or “Sorry I am the worst” will send the same message, but in a more sincere and gracious light that will be received much more positively. With enough practice, responding like this will become your automatic reaction and I promise you will radiate more confidence and security in all of your interactions!


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