Dear Angry Single Girls,
As we Collegiettes know, there’s no escaping the stampede of happy couples we see on Facebook, tagging each other in cute photos of trips taken together, or walking down a street holding hands. I hope I’m not the only one who has felt the need to rip the shoes off my feet and throw them at their heads. I’m happy to say that I have turned a new leaf: from angry single girl to content single girl.
Singledom does not define you, by any means. It’s not an automatic check in a box that says “Unhappy” or “Wild.” If anything, being single is probably the most intimate relationship you’ll ever have. The relationship you have with yourself should be one of your priorities, because it means truly knowing yourself: the good, the bad, and the SSB (Secret Single Behaviors).
That’s not to say that people who are in perfectly happy relationships are losing out or in some way to blame. Relationships can make you happier but it’s up to you to be happy. No one can make you happy if you choose not to be. The idea that people in relationships are in some way lucky or are something to covet will make you lose out on enjoying being single. In fact, it’s a constant woe of people in relationships to see single people and their “freedom.” Again, a relationship doesn’t equal jail, as much as being single doesn’t equal sitting in your pajamas watching reruns of Sex and the City (though it does sound like a good time). There are many sides to both aspects of relationships: the one you share with yourself and the one you share with others.
High school for me was a time where every relationship felt like till death do us part. When I moved to college, it was a total jungle out there, but in the past two and a half years, I’ve learned more about myself than I had in any relationship I’d been in, and while I still do cherish those past relationships, they remain where they should be: firmly in the past.
I learned that I didn’t really need a relationship to define me and tell me who I am: 20, single, and downright fabulous.
HCXO,
Divija